A Five-Year-Old's Sense of Humor

In search of a lighter topic:

M. thinks he's pretty funny. And so do we, but not always for the reasons he thinks, but we laugh a lot around here.

Here's his idea of a really funny knock, knock joke:
M.: "Knock, knock."
Me: "Who's there?"
M.: "Aren't you glad I didn't say banana?" Lots of laughing.
Me: "Um, I think you forgot part of the joke."
M.: "Nuh-uh. That's how it goes."
Me: "Oh, okay. Ha, ha, ha...."

Also, we never know just what he'll turn up wearing. One day he could be Zorro riding the neighborhood on his trusty old too-small bike, another he could be some weird combination cheesehead person with his "mad face." That one had me rolling when he came up to me wearing it.

Another thing that both boys, but especially M., think is just hysterically funny is trying to scare Mommy by putting a toy snake, frog, or bug on my pillow when I'm not looking. M. is really good at this, because he'll sneak into my room and never say a word before he goes to bed. I never even know he's been in there at all until I go to bed later and there it is.

Most of the time I just see the latest treat and laugh, but the other day M. got me good. When I pulled back the comforter, a black lizard leaped out at me. I yelled, and once my heart slowed a bit, I looked, and, sure enough, it was plastic. It had been placed just right to flip off the blanket when I moved it. My husband laughed so hard to think about M.'s sneakiness finally paying off and he didn't even get to see it. When we told M. the next day that he really had scared me that time, he thought it was hilarious. Meaning there have been even more creepy crawlies left on the pillow since.

As long as they never, ever, ever get the bright idea of using a real snake skin or live creepy thing, we'll be ok. I'm not sure my heart could survive the real thing.

Writer's Block

I've been facing a bit of writer's block (blogger's block??) since yesterday. In fact, I did write out the thing that is heavy on my heart, but decided it is not something I ought to put out here in detail, due to the fact I'm trying not to be publicly critical and complaining. Suffice it to day we are still struggling with some things at our church and that I have spent much time crying over them. I am convicted that I need to be spending as much or more time praying over them as I am crying about them, however, so I won't go into details here again. That will be for my personal prayer journal. I am also a little nervous, but also encouraged, because my husband is planning to take some of the specific concerns to the pastor when the opportunity arises and be blunt about what his concerns are. I'm praying for my attitude and that I would be obedient to God in how I think and act on this, and for my husband to have the right words at the right time, and for the pastor to be able to hear him, because we really do want God to be glorified through this church body. And we really do want people to be hearing the truth explained well whenever the church doors are opened so we can truly be equipped to live out our faith in the community. We are encouraged, too, because yesterday afternoon D. talked with another deacon at the church who seems to be becoming aware of some of the same issues independently of us. As they talked, D. was really encouraged that perhaps there is still hope for our church.

It is also encouraging that the pastor is supporting a massive curriculum change in the Sunday School that will affect babies through adults. It is doctrinally sound and teaches the Bible more chronologically and shows how God's plan throughout scripture fits together and how all scripture is connected. This is very different from the traditional way of teaching a story here and a story there, but never spelling out why it is all important together as HIS story, and how a proper understanding of the Bible leads to a proper understanding of Who God is and of the atoning work of Christ. I'm excited about that. So, I'll be spending some time in prayer today, for sure, and I hope to spend less time complaining on my blog and saving that for the private prayer journal.

Why I Blog

I’ve been thinking a bit about why I write this blog. Part of the reason is that after years of my husband saying, “That’s a good thought. You should start a blog and write about it.” I finally got over my fears of “being on the web, anybody could read my stuff, and then they could find us and you never know just who is out there” and jumped in. And, let’s face it, if I deep down didn’t want anyone at all to read what I’ve written I’d just get a notebook and keep a private journal. I do a little of that, too, but not as much. I seem to be able to get my thoughts out better behind a keyboard than with pen and paper.

So, my reason for blogging is that I like to write. I really, really like to write. And I needed a place to spill some of my thoughts. I try hard to make sure the spiritual thoughts I share are doctrinally correct, and if I learn I’ve gone off the rails in that way, I’ll make every effort to correct it. But my purpose in writing those thoughts is not to instruct or teach, but to work out my own understanding of things I’m pondering. So, in that way, those more serious posts are personal devotions, I guess. But, obviously, I don’t mind sharing, or I wouldn’t blog. At the same time, I’m not looking to argue with anyone. That’s why I don’t go to some of the more contentious blogs and enter the fray and argue in the comments sections. I just write what I believe, again, making every effort to stay within the bounds of scripture. Hopefully, I’m not saying offensive things, but if someone disagrees with me, that’s okay. But not all my posts are serious and heavy thinking. Sometimes I like to just write about my kids or my “Front Porch” everyday kind of thoughts. These, too, I try to keep within the bounds of scripture, but they are just thoughts about everyday kinds of things.

Something really neat is that Blogger is free! It’s been nice to have an outlet, that’s for sure, and I’m really glad it’s not costing us financially. Though, I’m finding I do need to find a balance. I’ve been on the computer too much lately, so it sometimes does have that hidden cost of time spent blogging that probably should have been spent elsewhere.

One reason I’m on the computer too much is that I’ve found several blogs I really have enjoyed reading. It is a lot of fun finding other women out there who think about serious things, too, and also to read their fun posts about how they enjoy their families as Christian moms should. This has become a real treasure for me. And there are other blogs I like to read, too, that may be more of a deeper thinking, teaching sort. I’ve learned much from them, as well.

So, why do I blog? Because I needed a place to write out my thoughts, and because I enjoy sharing them to a small extent. I’m glad my husband encouraged me on this venture, and I’m glad he’s still encouraging me. There have been a few posts I’ve saved to draft and asked him to read before I hit that scary post button. Hopefully, he’ll help me to reign in my too much information tendency. And I blog because I enjoy it, and I’m enjoying finding other treasures on different blogs I read. I also like to leave a comment now and then when a post someone has written has touched me in some way and to encourage that writer that what they said was worthwhile. And I appreciate the kind comments that are left here, too, though I don’t always respond. I appreciate all of them. And I’m, most of the time, glad I listened to Hubby’s advice and started writing.

Fears in the Night

Our middle child is fanciful, creative and very imaginative. This makes for a lot of fun. During the day. Unfortunately, his very active imagination has a big downside, and that is his fear at night. For a few weeks now, he has had a real struggle with what he calls "bad thoughts" when he is trying to settle down at night. When we ask what kind of bad thoughts he's having, it's usually that he is afraid monsters are either under the bed, in the attic (access door in his room), or in the part of the bookshelf with the closed doors (we've started letting him leave those doors open). We aren't sure what has brought on this sudden fear of monsters ("munsters"), because we've always been careful what he is allowed to watch and we try very hard not to talk about anything scary with him close to bed time, but we certainly don't laugh at his fears. It would be easy, as rational adults, to downplay them, but I remember how scared I used to be at night, and at 5-years-old, those fears are very real. In fact, there are times I struggle with fear in the night, though my fears aren't monsters like M.'s. When I was younger, I used to love to watch certain shows that now, years later, the scary feelings from them get stuck in my head at times. So, I don't laugh at M.'s fears.

So, we've been trying to talk him through these fears and we've been praying with him a lot about them. We tell him that Jesus is bigger than any of the fears and that there are no such things as monsters and that Jesus will take care of him. We've also taught him to get a book and look at it to try to turn his thoughts elsewhere. And I always leave a light on downstairs so he doesn't have to creep around a pitch dark house if he does get up at night.

We've been teaching M. some scripture verses lately, too, to help him to remember that God is real and that He will care for him even when he feels afraid. These are scriptures we are reading to him and also claiming for him:

Psalm 23:4 "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me." (The boys are learning the whole Psalm, but we're especially emphasizing this verse with M. when he is scared.)

Proverbs 3:21-26 "My son, let them not depart from your eyes--
Keep sound wisdom and discretion; so they will be life to your soul and grace to your neck. Then you will walk safely in your way, and your foot will not stumble. When you lie down, you will not be afraid; Yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden terror, nor of trouble from the wicked when it comes; for the LORD will be your confidence, and will keep your foot from being caught."

Psalm 4:8 "I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; for You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety."

Isaiah 26:3 "You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You."

2 Timothy 1:7 "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

One night M. came down a little after we had put him to bed just in tears and crying so hard it was difficult to understand him. We got him calmed a bit and asked what was wrong and he said, "I'm afraid I don't believe in Jesus."

We asked him why he thought that, and he said that he keeps praying, but he still feels afraid. I took him up in my lap and just hugged him. D. said, "You know, M., the fact that you're afraid you don't believe in Jesus is a pretty good sign that you really do believe Jesus exists. If you didn't believe He hears your prayers, you wouldn't care."

"Really?" M. said. Then we told him he needs to believe God is in control, prayed with him again and took him back up to bed. I hurt for him struggling through his fears, but, at the same time, I was a little excited by this exchange because he tends to be pretty quiet about spiritual things, and this was really the first serious indication I've had that he is thinking over what we're teaching him and processing it. It is also a difficult thing to get across to him that God is not a genie to just grant us anything we ask. We are created for His pleasure, not the other way around. M. thinks if he prays for his fears to go away, that if he still feels afraid, then God must not be listening. We're trying to teach him to trust God even when he feels afraid - to understand that God is in control and will help him get through the fears. This is so hard for a 5-year-old to comprehend.

Last night, M. told his daddy that, while he believes God will take care of him, just in case he's going to sleep with the covers over his head tonight. Why? Because that way, the monsters can't see him.

We continue to trust our loving God to draw these children to Him, in His time. And we continually pray for the wisdom to teach them the truth correctly. We also pray the Holy Spirit will prick their hearts and enable them to understand the scripture we teach them and that they will learn to place their trust in Christ alone, for it is only in Him that we are freed from fear.

Goin' On a Treasure Hunt

I'm a little slow in posting this, but Everyday Mommy is hosting a nice thing on her blog. It's a Hidden Treasure blog awards. So, if you've found some meaningful, funny, faithful, interesting posts at some of your favorite, but maybe not as well-known blogs, then check out the rules here and get ready to submit your nominations. You can also start hunting by looking at blogs that are new to you and searching the archives for nuggets of treasure. I've already started making my list!

The Tomorrow Mentality

"Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit"; whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that." But now you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil.
Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin." James 4:13-17

Lately I've found myself to be a "tomorrow" or a "one day" kind of person. You know, as in, "Tomorrow I need to spend some serious time in prayer about some things I'm dealing with." Or, "I really need to call so-and-so, but I'm busy right now. I'll do it tomorrow." Or, worse, "The kids really need me to sit and spend some quality time with them, but I'm washing the dishes right now. I'll do it later." Ouch.

In the three years we've lived in this town, I've spent an awful amount of time complaining about the town, our church, the fact that I haven't really made any true friends since we've been here, etc. I've also spent a fair amount of time wishing we were somewhere else. My mentality has been, "Well, I'll mark time here for now and one day it will get better." That's not the right attitude to have. My first experience with this town was when I came down with my husband for his initial job interview. That took place immediately upon his return to the states from a year of active duty in Bosnia. I met him in Kentucky when his unit flew in, and the two of us drove south for his interview, which he had set up through e-mail conversations with the man who became his current boss. He didn't even get to go home and see the boys first (we lived in Indiana then). When we visited here, I was less than impressed and didn't want to move here, but D. needed a job, and this was really a dream job in his civilian career, and the Army only pays some of the bills, seeing as it is his "part-time" job. So, sitting in that hotel room, listening to D. talk about what a great interview it had been and how the job was just perfect, I asked, "So, it looks like you're going to get an offer, huh?" And I truly was excited for him. I just wasn't as excited about the location. But two weeks later, we were moving in to our new house, and now it has been a little over 3 years. This is where submission can be hard! Don't get me wrong, this is a beautiful part of the country. It's just a much smaller town than I had ever lived in before, and I am so not used to not having a mall and all the amenities a larger city can provide, and the Lord has really worked on me about the church issues as well, and we are still praying over some of them, as I've posted in the past. But the way the whole thing came about, it was just obvious that God had provided this job for D. and that this was the right move. That's why my feelings about it have been such a hard thing for me to work through. Though, slowly, slowly the Lord is teaching me things and I'm learning to be thankful we moved here.

Anyway, while indulging my attitude about our new home, I have not done what I ought to do. I have gotten involved at church, but I've held people at arms' length. There is a young mom I know I need to reach out to, but I've been procrastinating. I don't know anymore why I'm having such a hard time reaching out, but it is a struggle. Also, in light of my post yesterday, I am really convicted that I've had an attitude of taking for granted that we have lots of tomorrows. We may, but, then again, we may not. Only God knows for sure. For us to assume we can count on tomorrow is the height of arrogance. I do know that God has written all the days He has fashioned for me. He knows the days of my life. But I am not guaranteed tomorrow. So, for me not to do today what I know is right and put it off until tomorrow, is to sin. It is essentially not to do what I know to do, because it seems I usually don't ever get around to most of those "tomorrow" things. And to assume that I have all the time in the world to catch up with old friends is also the height of arrogance. The time to do that is now.

So, I'm going to make a phone call right now and set a time to get together with that young mom I know that needs some encouragement. How about you? What have you been putting off until tomorrow?

Satisfying My Blog Fix Now That I'm Home

As the boys' school was out yesterday and today, and since we did not go to Florida over Christmas break, we decided to take a quick weekend trip down to see my parents. We left on Saturday morning and got back tonight, and I'm in blogging withdrawal, so thought I'd at least post a short one this evening, though I'm so tired that it won't be anything very deep.

This was probably the first time we've been there that the boys were old enough to actually care that this is the town I grew up in, so we took them around and showed them the mall and, more exciting for them, Ron Jon's Surf Shop and Cocoa Beach. They each got a Ron Jon t-shirt, M.'s has pirates on the back and J.'s has the space shuttle. Very fitting if you know these boys. We also found some Florida Gators National Championship t-shirts at my favorite store, Target. The boys and D. also got to enjoy swimming in Grandma and Granddad's pool and J. had a blast on the slide. The water was a bit cold for R. and me, so we just watched.

Jeff Foxworthy would probably say we are rednecks. You might be a redneck if you've ever spent an hour at a table at the hamburger grill at the Daytona International Speedway feeding a squirming 8-month-old. Let me explain. I do not think it would be possible to be less interested in NASCAR than I am, but my oldest son thinks he wants to be a race car driver when he grows up, so, since we were driving right by the exit to the Speedway on our way home today, we stopped so the boys could see it. I must say, it was pretty impressive when those cars zoomed by on their practice laps. And the boys enjoyed being there. Now they want to go to an actual race. I told them that will have to be a "Daddy and the boys" trip someday. J. told his teacher the other day that he wants to be a NASCAR driver, and Mrs. L., who thinks J. is really smart, told him he should be a race car driver on the weekends and a doctor or something during the week. J. said he'd rather be a doctor or something on the weekend and drive a race car during the week. Sure hope he outgrows that ambition!

Anyway, we had a good visit and the boys and R. were very well behaved until R. decided about an hour from home this afternoon that she had had enough of her car seat and started screaming nonstop until we could get out at a rest area and let her stretch a bit. So, we're glad to be home and glad we had a nice visit with my parents. And it's off to school tomorrow and back to real life.

School Lunch

Last year, school lunches were fairly simple. I made J.'s lunch everyday except pizza day or beef & cheese nacho day, when he would buy. Without fail. Now that M. has joined the school scene, we've gotten a little more adventuresome on which days school lunch will be bought. M. has done a lot to help J. get out of his "Monkishness" and try some new things. (By the way, Monk starts again next Friday night on USA, if you're interested.)

Anyway, this new spirit of adventure was the reason the boys decided to try meatball subs yesterday for lunch. I thought it sounded pretty good. So, when I picked them up and we were driving to piano lessons, I asked them how lunch was. Both agreed that the meatball subs were good. Or to quote M. "Mmmmmm!" with raised eyebrows.

Then J. told me, "It was good, but one of my meatballs fell out and rolled on the floor."

Then M. said, "Yeah, my sub exploded and all my meatballs fell out, but they landed on my tray."

I started laughing. And couldn't stop. I just got this image of about 400 elementary kids at lunch with exploding sandwiches and meatballs rolling all around the cafeteria. Bet they rethink that lunch idea.

Check Out This Link:

This post was interesting. It kind of exposes the seeker-sensitive way we present the Gospel and how we miss the mark in leading people to believe that "all they have to do" is pray a "sinner's prayer." It is important to tell people the truth about sin, God's wrath and anger at sin, man's lostness in his sin, and the Good News of Jesus' incarnation, sinless life, death on the cross and resurrection - His sacrifice that has satisfied God's justice and paid the price for our sin. It is only in His righteousness that we have any hope. Apart from Christ we are hopelessly lost and in bondage to our sin. In other words' we need to get it right. That is something I strive to do when talking about the Gospel with my children. I do try to use words they will understand, but I don't want to ever dumb it down and tell them essentially an untruth by not giving them the whole truth.

A Winter Day

A composite of the type of conversation I have on any given chilly morning during the winter:

Me: "J. and M., wear long pants and long sleeves. It's cold out today."

One or the other boy: "Can I just wear long sleeves and shorts?"

Me: "No, it is winter. It is cold. Wear jeans. There are clean ones in the laundry basket you passed 5 times on your way upstairs yesterday afternoon."

Now, we've had breakfast and are getting ourselves to the car:

Me: "Guys, put your jackets on, it's cold out."

One of the boys: "Do I have to wear a jacket? It's already in my backpack, and I have long sleeves on. I always get hot."

Me: "Yes. You must wear a jacket. There is frost on the ground outside. It is winter. Put. It. On. Now."

Sulky looks, but the jackets go on.

Now we are at school and climbing out of the car.

One of the boys: "It's cold out here."

Me: "This is what I'm saying." Mentally smiling and trying not to scream.

Question of the Day - Fire Safety

I've decided the question of the day is : When was the last time you were a.) glad you owned a fire extinquisher, b.) wished you owned a fire extinguisher or c.) wished you knew just for the life of you where in the world you had put the fire extinguisher when you moved into the new house? I'll be answering c.

A time I wished I had known where in the world our fire extinguisher was:

Before I go any further, it is important to note that my oldest son is extremely nervous about fire safety. Anytime they discuss it at school, we go through weeks of questioning about the smoke alarms (do they work, will I hear it, what if I don't hear it, etc.) So, we try to reassure him ("Honey, we're very careful, the house isn't going to catch fire. That's pretty rare. Yes, we check the smoke detectors often.") J. has even drawn out a fire safety plan for his Cub Scout project.

Well, not long after we had moved into this house, hubby was away for a meeting or drill or something (I don't remember) and I decided I would make pizza for dinner. I happily fixed the dough and popped it into the oven for 5 minutes. Then I took my pizza stone (Pampered Chef, of course) out of the oven, placed it on a pot holder on my counter (didn't want to scorch the new counters....) and put on the sauce, cheese and toppings. Then the pizza stone went back into the oven.

A few minutes later, I looked over at the stove. You know how one burner is open to the oven? Well, my teapot was on that burner and there was "steam" coming from under the teapot. I said, "Why is steam coming from under the teapot?" and picked it up. It wasn't steam. About that time the smoke detector in the kitchen went off, thereby setting off every other smoke alarm in the house. J. came running in to find me throwing open the oven door and smoke billowing out. I went running for the baking soda after turning the oven off and dumped the whole box on the flames. Then I got the smouldering mess out and realized that when I had put the pizza back in, I was wearing my oven mitt and didn't realize I had grabbed the pot holder under it, too. That's what caught fire.

The hardest part of the whole ordeal was having to stay extremely calm myself while frantically trying to get the fire out with the very loud smoke alarms blaring and blaring, because J. was watching with saucer-like eyes and getting more and more worried and throwing all kinds of questions at me. Needless to say, I did get the fire out, no one was hurt, but the smoke alarms blared for a while until I could get the house aired out. At it did wonders at setting back all our reassurances for J. But I think it helped him to know that there is NO WAY he could sleep through that racket and that I kept my cool and didn't panic. That's only by God's grace, too.

So, I'm still having a hard time getting all that baking soda out of the oven, but, thankfully, no one was hurt, and no real damage was done.

Works For Me Wednesday - Two Recipes My Kids Like

With this light and healthy themed Works For Me Wednesday, I’m trying my first entry in this blog carnival. In my husband’s civilian, real, full-time job (as opposed to his Army Reserve sideline), he works in cardiac and pulmonary rehab and diabetes management, so he is pretty up on current healthy eating research. He came home from a conference recently and now he’s got us working towards a Mediterranean diet (lean meats- but not every day, fish, whole grain breads or pastas, olive oil, lots of veggies and some fruit, as a very brief summary) and smaller portion sizes. This isn’t a scripted diet like South Beach, it’s more just a healthy way of eating. I’m finding that in weight control, portion size is definitely the key. Anyway, these two recipes fit in nicely, and my kids like them (always a plus). I don’t know if they always would have liked them or if they are just getting used to the weird things I fix in the on-going effort to be healthier and lose that pregnancy weight plus another 10 pounds.

Black Beans and Yellow Rice

This is super easy and my kids love it.

1 package yellow rice mix (what size mix you use depends on how many you are feeding, obviously)
1 can black beans (you’ll need more than one can if you have a bigger family)
1 can chicken breast (white meat only) or you can cook as many chicken breasts as you need and shred the meat, but I usually just used the canned because it’s easier.

Prepare yellow rice mix according to package directions, but add the shredded chicken when you pour the rice into the boiling water. In separate pan warm black beans.

That’s it! Serve black beans over the rice and chicken mixture. You can add cheddar cheese, but remember that adds fat! So I usually don’t. My kids love this meal, and it’s quick and easy to fix. I usually will serve it with steamed broccoli and a salad with light dressing, and some fruit for dessert.

Pasta G Viola

We had this last night, and, surprisingly, my boys really liked it! It comes from a vegetarian cookbook I bought just to be nice to a girl who had come to our door with a fundraiser, but I’ve found many recipes in it I like: CHOICES: Quick & Healthy Cooking by Cheryl Thomas Peters

1 Pound vermicelli or angel hair pasta (I use whole wheat pasta)
2 T light olive oil
1 large onion, chopped
10 Garlic cloves, minced
4 cups precooked cannolini beans or white kidney beans, undrained (I used two cans cannolini beans)
Salt to taste if desired (when I used canned beans, I don’t even need to add any salt)
Parmesan cheese, for garnish if desired

1. In a large saucepan, start water for pasta.
2. In large skillet, combine olive oil and onion and cook over high heat until the onion is lightly browned. Add garlic and cook gently for an additional 3 minutes, but do not brown onion or garlic any further. Add precooked beans with liquid and return to a boil. Lower temperature and simmer for 5 minutes. (Additional water can be added to this sauce at this time if necessary.). Add salt to taste, if desired.
3. Put pasta in boiling water during the 5 minutes that the bean sauce is simmering. Cook pasta to the al dente stage and drain. On individual plates put a thin layer of pasta and top with a generous portion of bean sauce. Be sure to drizzle the bean liquid over the pasta to add flavor. 4. Sprinkle lightly with Parmesan chesse, if desired, and serve immediately. This dish tastes wonderful without any cheese.

I serve this with broccoli or another green vegetable. It is also good with a crusty bread like French bread, but we’re cutting out unnecessary carbs, so we don’t do the bread.

Check out Rocks In My Dryer for more Works For Me Wednesday recipes today.

On the Lighter Side

Go Gators.

Florida: 41 Ohio State:14

Nice.

Okay, I know that in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter one bit that my team won the National Championship last night.

But it was fun to watch! Let me rephrase. It was fun to watch the first quarter and then spend the second quarter dozing on the couch until half-time and wake up every now and then to ask my husband, "What, what did they do?" I went to bed at half time, which was around 10:30pm, because I knew Boo would be up at zero dawn thirty this morning like she has been every morning for the last 2 weeks. But she's sleeping in today, what do you know? Thanks, Boo! Anyway, when D. finally came to bed last night I opened one eye and said, "So, did they do it?" And he said, "Oh, yeah. 41-14." Then I said, "Oh, good. I'm so glad." And promptly fell asleep again.

So, while I wouldn't have lost any sleep whether the Gators won or lost, I'm pretty glad they won. And now, breakfast must still appear on the table shortly, and boys must be gotten ready for school, and I have lots to do around here today. So, I think I'll take a bit of a bloggy break for the rest of today. Unless I just have something I have to say. This is my primary source to vent these days. Note to self: Less public blog venting. That is what the purple notebook is for.

And on that note, there's Boo making her morning wake-up noises.

Christian or Christ-Follower?

Jules at Everyday Mommy is encouraging us to be Thinking Christians. To which I say, "Amen and amen!" She references a video produced by Community Christian Church in the Chicago area then asks for comments on this parody of the Mac vs. PC commercials which puts a "Christian" in the role of the PC and a "Christ-follower" in the role of the Mac. You can see the link to that video in her post "If Pastor Bob Says It's Okay Then It Must Be Okay." This sort of piggy-backs off my recent posts about discernment and my feelings of hypocrisy, so I thought I'd tackle answering the questions she asks.

Her questions and my responses are:

1. How is the Christian portrayed? Favorably or unfavorably? How is the Christ Follower portrayed? Favorably or unfavorably?

The Christian is portrayed as a stereo-typical Independent Fundamental type with a heavy stack of dry, boring books and rule manuals with KJV only Bible on top, and bumper stickers inside his suit so everyone will know he is a Christian. It's meant to be quite unfavorable. The Christ Follower is portrayed as cool and relevant, your best buddy, very likable and totally unencumbered by all the books and "stuff" of the fundamentalist. It's meant to be favorable and approachable.

2. What message is the video attempting to convey about those who use the name Christian?

Uncool, not relevant, reads too much, too interested in his image and wanting to be known as Christian. Not approachable. Proud, arrogant, etc. A Pharisee.

3. What audience is this video attempting to reach?

Young and/or disaffected with church or Christianity. Those who associate Christianity with the stereotype presented by the "Christian." To some extent I can agree with the sentiment behind this, for I think some groups have done damage to our witness by being too much like this stereotype and not as loving as we ought to be when sharing the Gospel. There is a group around here that stand on the corners around the "Historic Downtown" area and wear sandwich boards and wave KJVOnly Bibles and shout. I'm not real sure how effective this really is. There was someone like that in Gainesville when I was a student at the University of Florida who would do the same thing in the Plaza, and when we walked by on our way to class, he would point a finger at us (yes, at me once, too) and shout, "Slut! Jezebel!" I guess because I was wearing pants, and modest clothing, at that? Anyway, I used to think, "How dare he? I am a Child of the King, and he doesn't know me at all!" So, if I, a real Christian would bristle at this, how much more so someone who is still in rebellion to God and hasn't been reached with the Gospel? Then he would "preach" and all that I ever saw come about was that large groups of sceptics would crawl out of the woodwork to debate him. I never once heard honest discussion with someone who was under true conviction. So. Point being that I do understand the sentiment of wanting to reach out to the disenfranchised, but I do NOT think we should compromise on what the Bible says to do it.

4. Is this just a case of semantics? Are Christians, after all, simply Christ Followers? What do you think?

I guess a case could be made that it is a case of semantics - after all, Christians are to be followers of Christ. However, having read quite a bit of what is going on in the current postmodern scheme of doing church, I don't think that's really all that is meant by the term. What I'm seeing in most of the instances where this term is being thrown about is an attitude of, "Hey, we're all on this journey together. You follow Christ the way you see fit, and I'll do the same, and we'll agree to be tolerant of each other and agree to disagree on certain things." Also, I don't hear much talk at all about repentance, God's wrath (and no, it is NOT just an Old Testament concept!) or the need to die daily to ourselves and take up the cross and follow Him. The kind of following that seems to be alluded to is more a "let's all just get along, and it's okay if you want to live however you want as long as you are nice to people and claim to follow Jesus." I wouldn't presume to say that this particular church means that with their video, just that this is what I tend to see when people use these false types of comparisons.

I say false comparison, because there are many of us who truly believe that the Bible is God's Word and that we need to be reverent before a holy God, but who are not like the stereotype offered up in this video. I do think as we become more and more casual, we are losing our reverential awe and respect for God's absolute holiness. When one becomes a Christian, yes, he will ultimately become a Christ-follower in that as the Holy Spirit works in us we will begin the walk of sanctification that will lead to our behavior coming more and more in line with obedience to His Word. But here's what I tend to see among the post-modern type of thought portrayed by this hip, cool, casual approach: they tend to be fairly worldly in their approach. Yes, we should understand the culture we live in, but we should not embrace the things in that culture that dishonor God - coarse speech, flippant attitude toward holy things, loving the things of this world too much, and a willingness to not call sin what it is - sin. And that is what I tend to see. So, yes, there is a difference. A Christian is one who understands that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life and no one comes to the Father apart from Him. A "Christ-follower" tends to be more open to discussion on what ought to be nonnegotiable things. There is something to be said about loving those we want to reach with the Gospel and trying to understand where they are coming from. But in doing so, we must not be just like them. We are different when we are in Christ, and we must be true to Him, not so in love with our liberty that we, in actuality become stumbling blocks by not looking any different than the unredeemed we seek to reach.

One more thing. In the video, the "Christ Follower" says to the Christian something along the lines of "That's a lot of reading." Kind of implying that we don't need all that, we just need to get about the business of following Jesus. Well, doctrine is important. Unless we do read the Bible and know what God has revealed about Himself, we can't really follow Christ. And, contrary to popular belief today, there are absolutes. That's not to say I understand everything I read in the Bible, but there are definitely knowable truths that aren't up for discussion. The Bible says what it says, and most of the time when people are wanting to quibble about meaning, I've found, it's over things that are pretty clear, but hard to accept. And therein is the crux of the issue, I believe. We don't want to admit we are totally depraved before a holy and righteous God. But that's what the Bible teaches.

"But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come. For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." 2 Timothy 3:1-8

Long post. Must now go and get about the mundane business of cleaning the house this morning.

Some Days I Feel Like Such a Hypocrite, Part 2

I meant that prayer I prayed this morning. But not two minutes after praying it, I was wrestling with my temper over how to motivate my two rambunctious boys to get ready for church this morning. They weren't even being bad, just being little boys. I don't know why the one Sunday each month Hubby has Army duty are so exponentially harder to manage than others. I get two rowdy boys and a 7-month-old ready every weekday and out the door to take the boys to school just fine, and we leave an hour earlier those days. But, for some reason, Sundays are different. But we did manage, and I kept my temper somewhat in check, though I probably yelled too much. Again.

I struggle a lot with being consistent in parenting. And I worry too much about how I parent. I know that God is control. I am trusting Him to save my children. But I don't want to ever be a stumbling block to them. And I think I am when I frustrate them by either offering too many choices or by not being consistent.

I just read an excellent post at Following Judah's Lion about being a disciple of Christ. And he used Matthew 6:33 to illustrate that we don't need another sermon about "how to," but we need to learn to be truly devoted disciples of Jesus and seek His righteousness. Now I'm getting off the computer and going to pray - for wisdom, yes, and the grace to parent well. But also that God would continue to develop in me a hunger and thirst for His righteousness so that I would be teachable and live out what I know is true daily in front of these kids.

Sunday Morning

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my strength and my Redeemer." Psalm 19:14

As I prepare for worship this morning, may I focus on You today, not on what others do or don't do. When I feel frustrated, let me lay it at Your feet and worship. No matter what anyone else does, please help my heart to be right and my thoughts on my Redeemer, and may I offer acceptable worship today. Amen.

Scintillating Dinner Conversation

The hospital where Hubby works has started a new thing where he can order a pizza from the cafeteria on Thursday, and they will payroll deduct for it and he can pick it up on Friday afternoon to bring home for dinner. I know what you're thinking: "You had hospital cafeteria pizza for dinner?" Go ahead, laugh, but it was really good. When D. brings it home in the box it's uncooked, but all put together, so all I had to do was pop it in the oven for 10 minutes and we had supper all ready. Because we believe in great home-cooked meals for our kids.

Anyway, here's what the boys were discussing at dinner tonight along with the standard, "What did you do at school today?"

J. put a huge 3-bite portion of pizza in his mouth whole, and D. said, "Don't do that. You need to eat slower and let it digest."

M.: "What's digest?"

Me: "It's when your stomach does what it does with your food." (Like my scientific explanations?)

M.: "Like when it gets all squishy in your tummy."

D.: "Yeah, like that."

M.: "And if you get too much squishy stuff in your tummy you get fat." (He's pretty scientific, too.)

Me: "Right, I guess."

M.: "Some people have bumps on their bodies that mean they are strong."

Me: "You mean muscles?"

M.: "Yes. How do muscles grow?"

Me: "You have to exercise a lot and eat healthy."

D.: "That's right."

If you've noticed that J. wasn't contributing much to this part of the conversation, it's because he was still chewing that monster bite.

I suppose we'll have to eat less of these pizzas if I don't want too much squishy stuff making my tummy fat. And my membership at the YMCA kicks back in at the end of the month, so hopefully my muscles will grow and my fat will subside as I exercise a lot and eat healthier. Thanks M. and J. for that scientific analysis.

Far As the Curse is Found

J. and I had that discussion again last night. The one about "good" and "bad." He's reading a book about the Civil War and wanted to know if the guys in blue were the good guys. I said that, while I believe that it is good that the North won that war, you can't look at history that way. It isn't like Star Wars with some all good and some all bad. There were good people and bad people on both sides. Even though the North was fighting for the right things, some of the people doing the fighting did horrible things. And though the South was fighting to keep in place an economy based on the despicable institution of slavery, there were people on that side who were decent as well. We had the same kind of discussion about the Roman Empire when he wanted to know why they destroyed the temple in 70 A.D. He wanted to know if it was "good" that Rome did that. We told him that whether it was good or bad (humanly speaking) depended on which side you were on, and that Rome was just doing what it had to do to stay in power against those who were rebelling. Whether or not the Roman Empire itself was good or bad is up to interpretation. It's so hard to get the idea across that history is just the story of what happened, and sometimes there's not a "good" or "bad" but just what is. J. wants everything to be spelled out like it is in stories. I did tell him that spiritually there didn't need to be a temple anymore because Jesus was the final and sufficient sacrifice. They didn't need to offer animals anymore. I hope we explained that well enough - he seemed to get it.

Poor J. He's so concrete minded and he wants everything to be black and white. We told him that sometimes history is a little more complicated than that. Then I told him, again, that really all of us are bad. We are all sinners in need of a savior. That's why it's so hard to say whether some things are good or bad because we are all depraved - sin mars everything - even good efforts and good causes. This is kind of heavy for an 8-year-old. It's kind of heavy for me.

As I've been reading in Genesis, I've been thinking some on what the implications of the curse of sin are. D. and I have been talking a lot about the implications of total depravity. He even brought it up in church council when, as Sunday School director, he was presenting a new curriculum and talking about how we need to be going about teaching the children differently than we have been. Total depravity means that every part of us is marred by the curse of sin. Our desires too. We are poor, blind and wretched apart from Christ. My righteousness is as filthy rags when offered up in my own strength apart from trust in Jesus. My hope is in His righteousness. When God told Eve that her desire would be for her husband, how does that play out for me as a woman today? It means that I am in a struggle with my flesh which wants to go my own way over and above my husband's leadership. It means I fight constantly the temptation to say that I know better or to push for what I want all the time rather than looking at what is more important for the whole family and trusting God to work in my husband's life and to direct him as he leads us. It also means that submission is not easy. This is where the Holy Spirit's leadership is so vital. He changes my desires to be conformed to His will. Praise God that when the Spirit regenerated me, He began a work that He will see to completion. This is what sanctification is all about. Learning to die daily to that fleshly sin nature that would seek to dominate and daily take up my cross and follow Jesus. So, no, J. there is none that is righteous, no not one. Nothing in my hands I bring, simply to His cross I cling. Only Jesus is good. And all praise to Him whose blessings flow far as the curse is found.

Quoth The Raven, "Nevermore".......

One morning back in November, I thought a squirrel might have fallen into our chimney. Well, I believe I've discovered what is actually happening when I hear those particular sounds. And it may be worse than a squirrel. It's more like something from some cheesy horror movie. What I believe I'm hearing are the flocks of VULTURES that have decided to congregate on our corner of the neighborhood. Here's some pictures I just took:




Here are two hovering on the shed my husband is building. They are, in a word, creepy. These things are huge, and they just sit on the roof like they are gargoyles or something. Their wingspan is large. The picture doesn't do them justice. I'm a little scared to let my 18 lb. mini schnauzer out in the yard when they congregate there. Though, after this morning when he woke R. up from her nap and just generally annoyed me all day, I'm sorely tempted to see what might become of him if they did show an interest in him.........


Here's two on my chimney. That's why it sounds like something is in there. The talons scratch the top and it echoes down inside. Lovely.


Here are some roosting on our next door neighbor's roof. You can't really see it in the picture, but they are all lined up along the crest of the roof.

The other morning, there were dozens of these huge, black gargoyles all over the yards in this area of the neighborhood. This is so not what we intended to invite to the yard when we filled the birdfeeder this winter. Why couldn't we just get nice little red cardinals? When they hulk on the roofs around here it looks like something from the movie, "The Birds" or an Edgar Allan Poe story. Just one more reason I love living here on "the island." NOT.

Afternoon Thoughts on the Treasure of the Bible

I wanted to write this while I'm thinking of it, but it didn't really fit with the last post, so I just wrote a new post. I'll write this, then we really need to get ready to leave for dinner and church.

While waiting in car-line to pick up the boys, I was listening to Nancy Leigh DeMoss on the radio. She was talking about the great sacrifices that were made by the handful of men who worked to translate the Bible into the English of the common people and by those who possessed that Bible once it was translated. Many of them were burned as heretics by the "church." As I was listening to that, I thought about what I'd written a couple of days ago about how many of us don't take the time to read the Bible. How very, very sad. On so many fronts. First, and most importantly, it is God's Word. How gracious it is that He has preserved it so that we can glorify and know Him and His salvation through Jesus Christ. But also, when such great sacrifice has been made by men in the past just so we could read it, what a waste to let our many copies go unread and treated lightly. How sad that so many in the world even today do not have the privilege of owning or even seeing a Bible to read, and we treat it so lightly. What a lazy, self-indulgent, ignorant lot we are! We really have absolutely no excuse for not knowing the Bible. How many American Christians have 2 or even 3 copies of the Bible around the house that they just take for granted? "For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more." Luke 12:48b

May we not take lightly the Word that God has so graciously given, and may we also not take lightly how high a cost our brothers in the past were willing to pay so that common people like ourselves would be able to read and know it, thereby knowing God. O, Lord, help me be teachable and willing to be a doer of the Word, not just a hearer. May I not become proud of the fact that I do read the Bible or of the knowledge I gain, but let me humbly live what You teach me each day.