Monday, June 02, 2008

At Blockbuster Today

I ran into Blockbuster today to return an online movie and redeem it for another one. Boo and I were the only customers in there and I knew exactly which movie I was going for so I grabbed it and walked up to the front, but there was no one at the register. I noticed someone was behind a shelf behind the register, so I went up and put my movies down and kind of shuffled Boo to my other hip, hoping I’d be noticed. I always feel a little uncomfortable in those situations, not knowing what to say to get her attention, but then I had to cough anyway, and she noticed me.

When she came up to the register and said, “Hi,” I noticed her eyes were red and I said, “How are you doing?” like I usually do.

She said, “Okay. I guess.” And then she gave a watery little smile and said, “It’s just one of those days when you just feel like crying all day, you know?”

I smiled sympathetically, thinking that I really wanted to say something comforting, but didn’t know what to say. Then she looked at me sheepishly while ringing up my movie and said, “I’m sorry.”

And I said, “It’s okay, we all have those kinds of days.”

“I just really didn’t want to have one here,” she explained, then handed me my movie and told me when it was due back.

I wanted so much to share Jesus with her. But all I managed to do was to stop as I picked up the movie and looking right at her I said, “I’ll pray for you today.”

She looked up and said softly, “Thank you.”

And I choked out a reply and left.

I wish I had said more to her. I wish I had shared with her that though I don’t know what she’s facing today, Jesus does. I wish I had shared with her that Jesus is the answer to our deepest need, to be made right with God. But I failed to give her a reason for the hope that is in me. I failed to share that light with her.

But I am praying for her. Her name is Mary. I don't know if she knows Jesus or not, but I should have tried to find out and once again I was silent when I should have spoken. Won’t you pray for her, too? I’m praying that God will bring someone who will be bolder in compassion and faith than I proved to be this afternoon into that store today to encourage her in Jesus’ Name. And I am praying that I will be better prepared next time to do the same as I confess my lack of boldness today.

3 comments:

Kimberly said...

I can't know for sure what God has in store, but as I prayed for Mary just now, I was compelled with the idea that you probably did just the right thing for now. I also feel like the Lord will bless you with another opportunity to see Mary and you'll get a chance to tell her you prayed and ask her how she is doing. I think the story isn't over yet. Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not a prophet, nor do I claim to be. I'm just leaving the comment I felt led to leave while praying.

You were already bolder (and kinder) than a lot of people would have been by telling her you'd pray for her. Don't be too hard on yourself :)

Sunny said...

I agree with what Kimberly said. I'm willing to bet it was a comfort to her for someone to actually take the time to say something to her and show her some empathy. Plus, when you said you'd pray for her, I know that you meant it sincerely. She will feel the power of your prayer, as well as the prayers of others who read this post. :-)

Lisa Spence said...

Oh my friend, we've all been there and done that. Certainly the Spirit is doing His good work of conviction so that next time you will see opportunity to declare the gospel...may I see it as well...thanks for your honesty here and I will certainly pray that the Lord will reach out to Mary...