As if Moving This Summer With Three Kids, a Dog and a Fish is Not Stressful Enough:

You are not as surprised as I was, trust me.

And it was confirmed by the doctor yesterday afternoon that we are expecting a new little family member somewhere around September 21. This was not in the plan. I am ashamed to admit that my first reaction upon seeing that result a couple of weeks ago wasn’t immediate joy. It was to alternate between crying, feeling overwhelmed, feeling some fear, and also feeling a budding excitement, with crying happening a lot for the first three days or so. Life is precious, children are a gift from the Lord. I believe this with all my heart. I also believe that a Christian marriage should have an attitude of welcoming children. And we do. I know it is God who opens and closes the womb. But my first reaction was that the timing right now is....interesting, not what we had planned or expected. And I feel so guilty about that.

A few reasons for my fearful reaction is that we will be moving before this baby is due. I will have to change doctors in the middle of it all. Scary thought. Another reason is that I have actually been pregnant six times. Well, seven now. Three of those pregnancies resulted in Joshua, Michael, and Rachel, for which Drew and I are very thankful. However, the other three resulted in painful miscarriages at 10-11 weeks. So, it’s a little hard to get excited this early on, and again I feel guilty. Also, since this wasn’t planned, I had been drinking coffee and sodas, so this poor little one is probably swimming in caffeine....something I wouldn’t have done had I been planning for this. The rest of my reasons are selfish, and again I feel guilty about that. We gave away all my maternity clothes and all our baby stuff before we moved here. We will have to start all over again, and that’s hard. My running goal, to which I had come so close (I was up to 25 minutes jogging, something I have never in my life been able to do before) is now being put on hold for a while. As well as my weight loss goal, though I am committing to eating healthier and snacking less than I did with previous pregnancies. And I really thought I was done with diapers. Sigh.

But, with some time and God’s grace, I am becoming excited about the little life that is growing in me, and praying for peace not to worry about miscarriage again or about the quantum leap my life seems to be taking at the moment. I have so many fears that I am not living up to being the kind of mom I am called to be, and adding one more child to our family only increases that daily dependence on God for His grace and wisdom. And I know that God is good all the time, and I can trust Him. Jesus is my great High Priest who is at the right hand of God and is ever interceding for me, His child.

About a year ago, I blogged about hineni, the Hebrew word that so often characterized the response of the Patriarchs and Prophets when God called. Hineni, roughly translated means, “Here I am,” with the intent of being ready and willing to obey, which is how Abraham, for example, answered when God called him. I said when I wrote that post that I want that to characterize my response to God’s calling, too. And I still do. Here I am, Lord, and I will joyfully embrace this gift, because it is a gift, and I will lay my fears in Your very capable hands. Jesus Christ is the Creator and Sustainer of the universe, surely He can sustain me as I seek to mother and love the children He has given me.

So, while this was not in our master plan, it is obviously in our Master’s plan for us, and we know that His plans for us are for our good and for His glory and He causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. I ask for prayer that I will continue to submit to God’s will for me joyfully rather than fearfully, because there is no question but that I am submitting.

LOSTie

The beginning of the end of LOST starts tonight!! Finally some answers! I promised Drew I would try to contain my excitement and wait to watch it on DVR with him when he gets home later tonight. I think I can manage that, at least.....

As Christ Loved the Church

I love my husband. I would like to take the occasion of the interesting week we have been having to brag on my husband a little. We have been beset by a most unwelcome stomach virus in our house this week. Starting last Friday night, no sooner would one kid begin to be on the mend from throwing up all night, when, like dominoes, the next would fall. All three kids eventually succumbed. We have been up virtually every night this week with either full blown sickness or some kind of miserableness. From the first incident, my husband has taken upon himself the worst of the clean up duty. I got up, too, and did my part, but my darling husband took the worst of it, because he knows that this particular type of thing is a weakness for me, especially right now. Small aside, why does it always strike at night? Why not during the day when I can chase the kid around with a bucket and contain the damage? But no, it happens at night when it’s going to get all over the bed stuff and carpet.

He was not happy about having his sleep interrupted night after night, who is? But, even though I get to stay home each day and he has to go to work, he still demonstrated such a servant’s heart this week. And he always does. One huge example of his servant’s heart that still moves me to tears happened a couple of years ago after we suffered a second miscarriage. Just the day before I had realized I was miscarrying, we had gotten the maternity clothes down from the attic. I had not even taken them out of the boxes yet. When we got home from the hospital, I was worn out and still under the influence of some of the anesthesia from the surgery I had had to endure following that miscarriage, and while I was sleeping a drug influenced and depression influenced sleep that afternoon, Drew quietly put away the maternity clothes, because he knew how painful it would be for me to look at them there when I woke up. He is constantly doing things like that, looking out for me and the kids.

I love how he works hard to support our family and to allow me to stay home with our kids. I love how he is coaching the boys’ Upward basketball teams, head coach for one and assistant for the other. He loves his boys and is involved with them. I love how excited he gets when our least athletic boy finally ‘gets’ it and has a great, a great I say, game and how proud of his son he was when the other boys on the team patted him on the back and told him what a good job he did during the game. I love that. And I love how he helps our least mathematically interested boy patiently and how thrilled he is when the light goes on for our son and he understands the math problem. I also love it when our daughter puts on her ‘dress up dancing shoes’ and says, “Dance with me, Prince Charming,” and he picks her up in her arms and dances with her. And I love that he sees the kids' growing relationship with Christ and the development of good character as more important than everything else. I love that he loves our kids.

Is my husband perfect? No. But neither am I. Marriage is such a picture of grace when two imperfect people, two sinners in fact, covenant together to love each other and to live together until death do us part. Both of us believe we made our vows to God and to each other before witnesses who were our family and friends. We hold that covenant as a cherished thing. I love that my husband is not just committed to me, but to our marriage. That is a significant thing. And it takes a lot of grace. God has extended such amazing grace to us in saving us from our sin and reconciling us to Himself through faith in Jesus Christ, and marriage can be such a picture of that grace and light to a dark world. But the neat thing about my husband is that he does this joyfully. He loves me unconditionally, and has demonstrated it over and over and over in such practical ways. I am not easy to live with. He loves me on days when I am just not all that lovable. He may not feel all that loving, I don’t know, but if that’s the case, I don’t think he has ever shown it. He just goes on loving me more than I deserve.

And in that way, he shows a picture of Christ’s love that marriage is meant to show. How thankful I am that I got the privilege of saying, “I do,” to Drew on December 18, 1993. For sixteen years we have been growing together as we’ve walked through a lot. We’ve endured separations due to his Army commitment, and one of the highest compliments he ever paid me was when he told me about how astounded he was by the kinds of trials some of his companions faced with not being able to trust their wives back home when they were away, and how thankful he was that he knew he could trust me and that the finances and home and kids and everything else were being taken care of when he was away. That’s because I love him and I want him to be free to do his job well and not be worried by a flaky wife back home.

I love that we can share what God is teaching us as we read His word and as we hear it preached. That is a very great blessing, to share the most important thing in life together as we grow in the Lord and grow together as a couple.

The word ‘submission’ has gotten such a negative rap in our culture, but I think that is because we have so distorted the biblical meaning of it as to make it virtually unrecognizable. I also have to say that my husband does such a great job with his part of the biblical picture of marriage, loving his wife, that it is a joy to do my part. (Eph. 5:22-33) It is easy to respect a man like my husband, and for that I am very thankful. How grateful I am that I get to spend my life with him.

Think The Shack is Okay?

If you've read The Shack, want to read it, have gotten sick of having it recommended, are wondering what the hype is all about, please, please, please read this post by Albert Mohler. Seems I am linking to him a lot recently, but please read this. If you want to know why I decided not to fill my mind with this book even though lots of surprising people were recommending it to me, this answers the question.

Thank you. Public service announcement in now concluded.

What's On My Nightstand - January 2010

It's that time again at 5 Minutes for Books when we list the books we are currently reading (or just finished). Here's mine for this wintry cold January:

Just finished:

9 Dragons by Michael Connelly...one of my favorite authors, I have read everything I can get my hands on from his Detective Bosch series and all the others. The interesting thing is that all of his main characters, whether in the Bosch series or not are connected somehow, and I want to read them again in order, because not only is each book a good detective story in and of itself, it is interesting to watch the characters progress through their lives and see how their stories intersect with each other. Besides that, Mr. Connelly is a fellow University of Florida alumnus, though he finished there before I had even hit high school, and I think that is plain cool.

Currently reading:

Guardian of Lies by Steve Martini....another author I tend to like. His books are also best read in order, though each is a stand-alone story too, but I wish I'd read them in order since it is a series that follows defense attorney Paul Madriani through his career. I have not read Mr. Martini's work as voraciously as Mr. Connelly's, but I enjoy them just as well. Detective and courtroom fiction are probably my absolutely favorite type of fiction.

For Bible Study:

Hoping for Something Better by Nancy Guthrie.....I've already blogged some about this, and I'm sure there will be further posts as we continue our Tuesday morning Bible study. It's good! Today's discussion was excellent...I'm really glad this group of ladies gets to meet each week to learn together.

For Small Group Study:

Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss....I really cannot recommend this book highly enough. I wish every woman would read it with an open heart and hear the wisdom in it. I've blogged a little about it and our group will be continuing to work through it until the spring, so I'll probably say more along the way. Ms. DeMoss does a wonderful job of pointing out the many subtle ways we buy into the world's way of thinking and helps us to retrain our thinking biblically. It's good!

Up Next:

John Adams by David McCullough. Very much looking forward to reading this biography. An HBO miniseries was made from it, which I hear was excellent. I actually bought this book for Drew for Christmas, but he's a little backed up with his reading at the moment, so I think I'll borrow it from him for a while and read it myself.

That's my short list for now. Please check out 5 Minutes for Books and see what other people are reading.

Tuesday Ponderings of Little Importance

I wonder if I made my boys buy the milk with their own allowance and they had to see for themselves how expensive it is, would it stop them from pouring a tall glass, drinking three sips and leaving the rest? I'm not saying this is what I'm going to do, but I wonder if it would work.

I may have found the answer to my potty-training frustration. She has gotten to the point where she knows what to do, she just doesn't like stopping whatever she's doing at the moment to go to the potty, and I'm tired of changing her pants 57 times a day and all the laundry that entails. Now, every time she potties or....you know....in her pants, she loses a toy. I don't talk loudly or get angry, she just knows that's the consequence - toy goes up on top of the living room bookshelf until she is able to stay clean and dry for a whole day. Then she gets it back when she has a dry day. So far, it's working. Two days and counting, and she can explain the consequence to us, so she knows what she's doing. We may just be on our way. Finally.

You know you have had a rather long run of gray and dreary days when your 3-year-old, while coloring in her coloring book, asks you what color the sky is and you answer, "Blue," and she says, "No, I think brown."

At least we get flurries with the gray and dreary today. That makes it interesting. And it's only 32 degrees - warm compared to minus 1 or some such very coldness.

The Y was very crowded today. People must be sticking to their resolutions....wonder what February at the Y will be like?

Well, I'm tired and need to go play with Boo for a while and maybe convince her to take a nap so maybe I can take one, too. That would be nice. Can't fault a girl for trying.....

Sanctity of Human Life Sunday

Genesis 1:27

"So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."

Psalm 139:13-16

"For You formed my inward parts;

You covered me in my mother's womb.

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Marvelous are Your works,

And that my soul knows very well.

My frame was not hidden from You,

When I was made in secret,

And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.

Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.

And in Your book they all were written,

The days fashioned for me,

When as yet there were none of them."

Interesting Thoughts from Albert Mohler's Blog

Albert Mohler has an interesting post today about "the death of the grown up." Very interesting discussion of a book written by Diana West that discusses the shift in Western culture over the past 50 years or so from mature adults being seen as authority figures and the source of wisdom to the so-called "wise child." Please read the article. I found it interesting, disturbing and extremely accurate.

In fact, much of what bothers me about letters that come home from school, ways the teachers talk to the students and approach their interactions, the philosophy behind the school mission statements and things, and a lot of the "parenting" advice that I read, and even some of the ways parents talk to their kids these days stems from this shift, I think. Have you ever watched a mom on the playground or out and about who pleads and reasons and cajoles a kid who is obviously not listening or obeying like she's afraid of him or something rather than being able to step up and be the MOM and take charge? And I've been there, too. I've bought into modern parenting philosophies without even realizing it and had to retrain myself in how to step up and be the adult. I have been annoyed by so many things I see in this way, but I could never put my finger on what it was that bothered me, and this is it. It is the shift from adults being authority figures to everyone bowing to the all wise child. I could say so much more about this.

Dr. Mohler's article from yesterday also fits in to all this, too, I think. Please read this one, too, which is also interesting and disturbing. In it he is discussing how kids are so media saturated that it's really scary, in my opinion. At the end of the article he quotes a pediatrician who basically says we just need to accept that this (the media saturation) is the way it is and learn to deal with it. Ummmm, again, why can't parents say no to some of the media saturation? We do. My kids do not have TVs in their bedrooms and they don't watch just any old thing, and our TV is not on all day, and my 11-year-old does not have a cell phone...and won't for the forseeable future, and we monitor the time they are online, too. It can be done. But it involves being the adult and setting rules and not bowing to everything the kid wants.

Random Thoughts for a Rainy Thursday

Why is Caillou bald? His little sister has hair, but he’s a little cueball. Why is that? And while we’re on the subject, does anyone else find that show really annoying? Just asking. Because I do, find it annoying, that is. Everyone is just way too sweet.

Something I miss about Florida: being able to buy fresh avocados. In Florida, I could buy an avocado that was still hard and let it ripen a day or two on the counter until it was just right for use. Here I buy avocados that have stickers that say, “Guaranteed RIPE today.” What that really means is that it took them so long to get here that they are already soft.....most are too far gone before they even hit the store, in my opinion. I keep buying the best avocados I can find, but they are usually a little riper than I would like. I still like the guacamole I make, though, even if it’s not quite as good as it would have been in Florida.

Something else I miss about Florida: being able to see the sun during the winter. It’s gray and rainy today. Again. Plus sides: it is not snowing and it is not anywhere near zero degrees. Hooray! And the squirrels are making themselves scarce today in the rain, so my dumb little dog is quiet.

My dog drives me crazy. He has discovered squirrels and barks at them. All. Day. Long. And when he is not doing that he is stealing food from the table.

I’m beginning to wonder if it is a losing prospect to teach my middle son organization skills. You should see his room. The room he paid his brother to clean. It was messy within days. He came downstairs in distress one day this week saying he had no pants to wear and he’d grown out of all the pants he could find. I went up there and opened his closet and just about had a conniption fit. At least 3 feet of clothes piled up in the floor. Apparently, when I sort, wash, and fold the laundry and deliver his to his room to be put away, rather than put them away, he has been shoving them into the closet. I started in on the organizing of the closet today, and guess what I’ve found. Pants! Yes, pants that...wait for it.......fit him. And I’m not even done. You probably don’t want to know about all the other hopelessly lost things I’m finding as I work my way to the bottom of this pile. Grrr.

That’s enough break for now. Got to get back to it.

Tuesday Morning Bible Study

I know I have mentioned before that I love my Tuesday morning Bible study group. I love sitting around the table with this group of ladies and opening God’s word and discussing the study we did over the week before. This week we got to dig in to Chapter One of “Hoping for Something Better,” exploring Hebrews 1:1- 2:4. Have I told you before that I really love the book of Hebrews? I do. I love how rich it is, how as we dig in we get to see that Jesus really is so much better than anyone or anything else.

God is, and He is not silent. He has spoken formerly through the prophets and in these last days He has spoken through His beloved Son, Jesus Christ. From the pictures of the Old Testament to the fulfillment in the New, what a blessing it is to open and read and heed His Word. What a blessing it is to be able to share together with like-minded women who love Jesus and who are willing to journey together as we seek to know Him and love Him more, to feed on His Word together. We had a wonderful discussion yesterday, and I am looking forward to the weeks ahead.

Last week we got to be reminded that God has broken the silence and spoken to us. And we talked some yesterday about how careful we need to be about experience-oriented faith and about not being too hasty to say “God told me....” without running everything, EVERYTHING, through the grid of His word. We talked about how so much of what is on Christian television is something to be very, very wary about. We talked about how much damage the ‘Prosperity Gospel’ is doing as people are sucked into its false teaching. You see, God has spoken to us...in His word and through His Son. We are to hear HIM. It isn’t about a feeling or experience, it is about faith in His revealed Word. It is about getting to know Jesus, the real Jesus, not what we think He is, or what we have become so comfortable with thinking about Him that we have begun to devalue His awesome majesty, but to really know Him.

And we can. Know Him. Jesus is the exact representation of God. He is the beloved Son. He is the appointed heir of all things. Meaning He can do just what He promised He will do because it is all His. He is the universe maker. He IS the radiant glory of God. Hallelujah! He is the powerful sustainer of all that is - and He will complete the work He has begun in those who have placed their hope and trust and faith in Him alone. He is the sin purifier. He is the seated Ruler...seated because His work is finished, and He ever intercedes for His own. He is the angels’ authority....have you ever noticed today how people love to talk about angels, but get really weird when you want to talk about Jesus and insist that He is the only way to God? People want spirituality and they like the idea of a guardian angel, but they want no demands made upon them. They want spirituality without Jesus. Problem is, that is not the truth. And Jesus is the enemy defeater. He is the One before whom every knee will bow.

I was thinking after this past week’s study about a sermon I heard once talking about how people talk about “God-to-me.” They say things like, “God to me is....” and they describe what a god in their image is like. They say things like, “My god would never....” Problem is, that’s an idol. Why settle for a weak and powerless “god-to-me” when we have been given the express image of God. Jesus came in the flesh to redeem us to Himself. We do not have to flounder around trying to define God or dictate what we think He should be like. How dare we? He has graciously given us Himself! How dare we neglect so great a salvation by settling for an idol of our own making? And knowing this, we must pay careful heed that we do not drift away. How I want to be about the business of heeding His word, and knowing Him and loving Him and living the life He has called me to live. May I be found faithful.

How good it is to read and study God’s word together and to talk about Jesus with other women who love Him and who also want to live a life that honors Him.

Moving Again

Well, since I've posted it on Facebook this morning, I guess I can write about it here, too. Drew got orders to report to Ft. Knox, KY in July, which means we have to move again - this summer. This is not unexpected for us, but still not easy, either. This time in St. Louis has been a real blessing. I am so thankful to God for the friends He has allowed us to make in the very short time we've been here, and I'm even thankful for Facebook which will at least allow me to sort of stay in touch when the time comes to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. Though we've known about it for a little while, we didn't tell anyone until we actually had orders because things change, you know.

It does look like it will be an exciting move, however bittersweet, but it's a little hard to get my mind completely wrapped around it yet. Anyway, that's the news from our front for now.

Praying for the People of Haiti

The Pyromaniacs website has this update about Haiti posted today. It is surreal watching the news coverage of this tragedy. I cannot comprehend the suffering the people are facing. Pray that those who would bring aid will be able to get it to the people soon.

Showing Support

Maybe I'm just cranky.

There's something that's been bothering me for a while, and I guess I'll just use the blog to try to hash it out for myself. Feel free to move along if you find this disagreeable.

I like Facebook. I enjoy reconnecting with old friends who I might have completely lost touch with altogether if we hadn't 'found' each other on FB. Granted it is not at all the same as actually seeing people and talking for real, but it does give some way to know how old friends (and new ones, too) are doing. I like that part of it.

Part of what I don't like about it is that you (read that "I") can waste too much time diddling around over there. It's so easy to go over to the computer 'just to check' and end up spending more time than I meant to. So, I have to place limits on myself.

One thing I find a bit annoying is some of the "pass it on" status updates. For example, there has been one going around recently about how it's time to show our support for our troops. It's all in caps, so I guess we're supposed to be yelling our support at the top of our lungs or something. Supposedly if you want to support the troops you need to post this status and tell everyone else to do it, too. I get e-mails quite frequently that say to forward the message on to everyone about supporting the troops, and the implication is that if you don't forward it then you must not support the troops. And I'm sure when people post that status or forward that e-mail, they probably feel pretty good about themselves for "showing their support."

Here's the thing. As an Army wife, seems to me the best way to "show support" isn't to hit the forward button or to copy and paste some dorky status. The best way to show support is to tell someone you know who is in the military, "Thank you for serving." Or something like that. When we first moved here, Drew and I were walking the boys in to their first day of school a year ago this month, and since Drew was on his way to work, he had his uniform on. A student who was in the hall came up to him, held out his hand for Drew to shake it, and said, "Thank you for serving our country, sir." That was cool. He didn't know us at all, but he went out of his way to 'show support' in a tangible way. Another way to show support is to show practical love to a military family when their soldier is deployed. Listen to them, offer to bring a meal or help a wife with some chore her deployed husband usually does when he is home (yard work, perhaps?), be available to just be a friend. Having been separated from my husband numerous times for various deployments and trainings and whatnots, I cannot tell you how meaningful those types of kindnesses can be. And, let me tell you, my husband feels supported when his family back home is treated kindly by people who remember he is away, too.

And while I'm thinking it out, there is more. Just because I didn't choose to post the color of my undergarments for all my Facebook friends to see does not mean that I do not understand or care about the serious nature of breast cancer. I get it. It is devastating and we all hope for a cure. I hope for a cure for other cancers, too. There again, seems like there are more practical ways to 'show support.' Donate to a cancer research organization, participate in some of the actual awareness events, do practical kindnesses for someone you know who is going through the horror of cancer treatments.

And one more thing. Just because I don't post a theologically unsound status or send an e-mail, don't assume that I do not love Jesus. I get so tired of the sanctimonious status things and e-mails that go around and say something like, "I'll bet most people won't post/forward this, but I'M not ashamed of Jesus...." or something along those lines. I get stuff forwarded to me that is just horrible theologically, and then there's the little thing at the bottom that implies that if you choose not to forward it and delete it you must not love Jesus. Actually, there are times I delete it BECAUSE I love Jesus and do not want to spread error about Him and how to worship Him. There again, there are more tangible ways to show that we love Jesus and are not ashamed of Him than to post a status or forward an e-mail and feel all good about ourselves that we've taken a stand for doing so.

I told you I was cranky.

Slush Puppy

It is 43 degrees this afternoon. Much warmer than temps to which we've become accustomed recently. MUCH warmer. Hey, it was actually pleasant out this afternoon. Compared to 1 degree with minus digits windchill factor, 45 is welcome indeed. And sunny, too! Growing up in Florida, I never would have believed you if you were to have told me that one day I would think 45 degrees is warm, but I have come to learn that it is all about perspective. It's also all about humidity. Florida cold feels different from Missouri cold, I'll grant you that. It feels colder at higher temperatures there, and there are lots of reasons for it which are way beyond the scope of this little post. Anywho.....it was a little hard not to leave snarky comments around my FL Facebook friends this week when they were whining about the cold there while we were so cold that frostbite was a real threat. Just sayin'. I also, for the most part, kept my snarky comments where they belonged, in my head and not on the computer screen. For the most part. I do remember what it was like when we broke out the heaviest winter gear for 45 degree weather. And, to be fair, when you live in Florida for years and years, you don't HAVE winter gear to break out when you have a weird year like this one. I also greatly appreciate the danger to the crops that the cold is there (save the oranges and strawberries!!). So there is sympathy from this end of the blogosphere. Some.

Anyway, on to today. Seeing as it was warm enough for the snow to be melting, I decided that it was warm enough to walk home from school. So, Boo and I put the leash on Roscoe and began our trek up to the school. And it was pleasant out comparatively speaking. We could actually endure being outside without our faces and hands hurting.

It was also muddy.

Unfortunately, I did not have the forethought to factor in just how muddy the dog would become. He was a mess. Really and truly. Thankfully, I DID have the forethought to put snowboots on the three-year-old, however. Those humongous puddles are just too irresistible.

By the time we got home, Roscoe was quite a muddy little thing, and I recruited my oldest son to keep him from venturing onto the couch while I changed my white sweater (forethought again) so I could give him a bath. I had been thinking just the night before that he needed one, and I sure am glad I waited. He hates to take a bath. I had to close him in the bathroom and force him into the tub, but once there he was patient.

You should have seen the state of that tub. It was trashed. So much dog hair and mud everywhere. Good thing I changed my shirt first. So, I also got to clean the tub this afternoon due to my need to get out of the house.

But it was worth it. Nothing relieves cabin fever better than to be able to go outside and breathe in some fresh air that doesn't hurt your lungs when you fill them. The dog was glad for the long walk, too. I think his cabin fever may just have been worse than the people in the house.

Thankful for the warmer weather today. Not nearly as optimistic as my oldest boy who asked me if this means that we won't have anymore snow for the rest of the winter. Dream on, boy, dream on.

Meeting Together to Study the Word

Our Tuesday women's study starts back today. We're going to be starting our journey through the book of Hebrews with Nancy Guthrie's book, Hoping for Something Better. I've been looking forward to this for a long time. I've missed our Tuesday meetings during the break, and I've had my appetite whetted as I began preparing for this study. Here's the letter I will share with our group today:

Hello Ladies!

My prayer for each of us as we study Hebrews together is that we will take the goals given in the book and make them ours. How I want to Go Deeper, Draw Closer and Hold Tighter to Jesus. I pray that we will grow in our understanding of and love for Jesus Christ, to desire Him more than anything or anyone else and to experience great joy as He satisfies our longing for something better by revealing to us more of Himself. I pray we will seek to live lives that honor our great King, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Ladies, let’s dig in and learn more about the great hope we have that anchors our souls as we continue to Hope for Something Better and learn to see Him for the great and glorious Lord that He is. Let us drink deeply of the Living Water that is Christ the Lord, our peace and the One who reconciles us to God, our Wonderful Counselor, Prince of Peace, and our hope.

This truly is my prayer as we seek to know Him more, love Him more and hold tight to His promises and trust His mercy and grace! How good it is to open His Word and know that He will speak to us through it.

For LOST Fans:

I got hooked on the story line of the TV show LOST during its first season, and I've followed it through each agonizingly slow revelation of plot twist and each much-too-long break between seasons up to now, when we are anticipating its final (finally!) season which begins in February. Finally we'll get answers. I have to tell you, that as a Christian I have become pretty sure I may not like the answers or the direction it takes, but, as I've said before, the story became so intriguing that were it a book I would have stayed up all night to finish it. Every episode, not to mention season, left us hanging, usually scratching our heads and saying, "I didn't expect THAT!" I drive my husband nuts with speculation after every episode. He will probably be very glad when the show ends, too.

Anyway, Drew stumbled across a Christian blogger who is writing some interesting discussion about the show, and, though I don't know if I will always agree with him and I try not to get too excited about supposed Christian themes from a secular show - mostly because I am pretty sure it's not being written from a Christian perspective and I am quite wary about the direction it may take, I thought I'd share a link for my blog friends who may share my interest in the show. Enjoy!

Snow Day Pictures

And now I can share some pictures from yesterday. Did I mention I am liking my new computer...and my new camera?

Behind our house

Roscoe bounding through the snow, probably trying not to let his paws touch that cold stuff too much.

M and Boo

J all bundled up for the cold

She finally got to make her snow angels after practicing in the living room floor all morning.

The big sled hill. Lots of fun, but the wind was bitterly cold so we didn't stay out too long.

Well, We Took the Plunge

I just found out we are having an "Extreme weather" day again tomorrow. But I have a new Mac to play with. Woo hoo! Bye-bye Microsoft, hello Apple! We were just plain tired of dealing with viruses - especially the latest one which basically destroyed our main computer. My husband says now my computer addiction could be justified as adding more fruit to my diet. Ha, ha. Very funny. I'm sure I'll be letting you know how the learning curve is going, but I must say, as of right now I'm liking it. A lot. It's so much faster!

Oh, and as to the extreme weather.....It's 12 degrees (feels like -7...that's MINUS 7) and dropping at the moment. Weather channel says Saturday's low is expected to be minus 1. Global warming, baby......HA! We're staying indoors and are extremely thankful for central heat. I'm not even complaining about how dry it is, I'm just very thankful to be warm inside.

Status Report - January 2010

Emulating my friend Lisa again, and still trying to get back into the blogging grove, here is my January status report:

Sitting: in my dining/living room, limping along with my slow computer (mentioned in the previous post).

Missing: being able to open my Google Reader, which, for some reason, I don't seem to be able to do with this computer. I have something like 240 unread posts sitting out there, and I miss my blog friends and reading what's going on out there in blogland. I'm not completely out of circulation, I'll be back to reading and sporadically commenting soon, I hope.

Drinking: hot chocolate that I'm sharing with my frozen little kidlets.

Enjoyed: playing in the snow with those same kidlets. Boo was so cute all bundled up like the little brother from "A Christmas Story." She even got to ride the sled down the sled hill with her brother and a neighbor boy a couple of times this morning. Climbing back up the slippery hill was....interesting. Thankfully her brothers take good care of her. I'm not so sure I would have been able to get back up that hill if I'd gone all the way down. Someone would have just had to send down an igloo and some firewood and we'd have had to camp out until it thaws, I think.

Laughed: When Boo saw her snow pants and said, "These are for cute little girls!"

Took: some funny pictures. Wish I could share them with you, but, well, we discussed that in the last post, too.

Contemplating: (don't get all weirded out, I mean it in the good sense, not the weird and mystical one) moving the blog. Several of my blog friends have done so and I am investigating it. I'm working behind the scenes on a new one elsewhere. I'll keep you posted. Only thing is, I'll miss my cute header. May have to commission a new one after I move if I can afford it. One thing I'm wondering, if I import my blog to a new site, does this one go away? Do I need to tell you all I'm moving before I try to import my archives over to the new place? I'm very computer illiterate. I know enough to know I'm quite sure about wanting to switch to Mac, though. That I do know.

Just finished: reading one of the bleakest books I think I have ever read. The Road is not your escapist reading, but it is one that leaves you thinking about things. It is also not for the faint of heart. It was not an easy book to read. It wasn't the language or the typical things that bothered me, but the total depression and hopelessness of it. It takes place in an Apocalyptic world, after a major tragedy has occurred over the entire earth, and, well, I'll just say that you get a glimpse of the total depravity of man when confronted with utter hopelessness in the particular dangers encountered by the father and son as they travel the road seeking warmer weather and looking for the "good guys" of whom you begin to wonder if there are any left. You also get a glimmer of hope in that it is a moving story about the strong bond of love between the father and son as you see the lengths the father goes to as he tries to protect and keep his son alive, and Drew happened to come home from work just as I was getting to the last pages and he asked me why there were tears streaming, streaming I say, down my face. I won't spoil it for you, but I will say that at the end, you are not left completely without hope. I can see why the book won a Pulitzer, but I would not give it a blanket endorsement because of the extremely bleak and awful nature of the subject matter. I don't think I'll be watching the movie. The book left me affected enough...I don't need visual images to go with those I conjured up on my own.

Preparing: for our Bible study in Hebrews, which starts next Tuesday. It's going to be good! Praying that each of us who are part of it will grow in our understanding and love and relationship with Jesus as we seek Him as the Something Better we long for.

Needing: to end this post. Drew wants me to look up some stuff as he decides where is the best place for him to go this afternoon to shop for a new computer.

Happy Thursday! And a belated Happy New Year, too, since I just realized I didn't wish you, my blog friends, that yet!

Snow Day!

Well, after nervously watching for the promised snow all day yesterday, and leaving choir practice and AWANA in the snow last night, we got a phone tree message last night at 10:17 PM (!!!!) saying that our school district had made the decision to close the schools today. Great rejoicing in the land this morning as the boys awoke to this joyous news. Roscoe, the hyper dog, is not as thrilled. We didn't even have to use a leash with him this morning, he did his business and ran right back to the door. He's no dummy. He knows where it's warm!

We ended up getting about 3 inches overnight and it's a winter wonderland out there. Boo has been practicing making snow angels in the living room floor this morning, so I guess I'd better get moving and get breakfast (and my necessary coffee) finished so we can get out and play.

I'd share some pictures from my NEW CAMERA (yes, my husband loves me), but our main computer has become infected with a nasty, nasty virus and is in the computer hospital, leaving me to limp along with Drew's old, very old, like when he was in Bosnia old, very slow lap top for any computing I need doing, and it does not have a memory card reader for me to download pictures. Seriously, ya'll, I feel like part of my right arm is missing without my computer. We are SERIOUSLY looking at leaving the Microsoft darkness and buying a Mac. Seriously meaning that I think Drew is going to be making a visit to the Apple store this afternoon. We are TIRED of the viruses and hassle of Microsoft. Sorry to my brother....., but I think we may be one more family making the exodus away from the PC and moving on to the better and friendlier world of the Mac. More on that as events warrant.

For now, I'm off to enjoy our snow day.

Quote of the Day

Or maybe it's the quote of the month, even. Love this quote.

"You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me." - C.S. Lewis

It's Snowing!

All the rain we've been getting has turned to snow today. We got a white Christmas! A Florida kid's dream.

Merry Christmas!

Luke 2:11
"For there is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord."

Luke 2:14
"Glory to God in the highest,
And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!"

Isaiah 9:6
"For unto us a Child is born,
Unto us a Son is given;
And the government shall be upon His shoulder,
And His name will be called
Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."

Isaiah 60:1-3
"Arise, shine;
For your light has come!
And the glory of the LORD is risen upon you.
For behold, the darkness shall cover the earth,
And deep darkness the people;
But the LORD will arise over you,
And His glory will be seen upon you,
The Gentiles shall come to your light,
And kings to the brightness of your rising."

Isaiah 53:4-6
"Surely He has borne our griefs
And carried our sorrows;
Yet we esteemed Him stricken,
Smitten by God, and afflicted.
But He was wounded for our transgressions,
He was bruised for our iniquities;
The chastisement for our peace was upon Him,
And by His stripes we are healed.
All we like sheep have gone astray;
We have turned, every one, to his own way;
And the LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all."

John 3:16
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life."

John 6:37
"All that the Father gives Me will come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out."

John 14:6
"Jesus said to him, 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.'"

John 1:1-4
"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men."

John 1:10-14
"He was in the world, and the world was made through Him, and the world did not know Him. He came to His own, and His own did not receive Him. But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name: who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth."

Romans 5:8
"But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us."

1 John 4:10
"In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins."

Psalm 118:25-29
"Save now, I pray, O LORD;
O LORD, I pray, send now prosperity.
Blessed is he who comes in the name of the LORD!
We have blessed you from the house of the LORD.
God is the LORD,
And He has given us light;
Bind the sacrifice with cords to the horns of the altar.
You are my God, and I will praise You;
You are my God, I will exalt You.

Oh give thanks to the LORD, for He is good!
For His mercy endures forever."

Revelation 5:9-10
"...You are worthy to take the scroll,
And to open its seals;
For You were slain,
And have redeemed us to God by Your blood
Out of every tribe and tongue and people and nation,
And have made us kings and priests to our God;
And we shall reign on the earth."

Revelation 5:12
"...Worthy is the Lamb who was slain
To receive power and riches and wisdom,
And strength and honor and glory and blessing!"

Revelation 5:13
"...Blessing and honor and glory and power
Be to Him who sits on the throne,
And to the Lamb, forever and ever!"

Psalm 27:4
"One thing I have desired of the LORD,
That will I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD
All the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the LORD,
And to inquire in His temple."

Jude 24-25
"Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling,
And to present you faultless
Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy,
To God our Savior,
Who alone is wise,
Be glory and majesty,
Dominion and power,
Both now and forever,
Amen."

The Best Things About Christmas

All the twinkling lights and glittering decorations….I love all that.

The excitement of the kids.

Christmas carols, the fun and the serious ones. Have you noticed, though that our Christmas hymns focus little on how we feel and much on who God is and what He has done? Some of our Christmas hymns are also some of our most deeply doctrinal songs, focusing our attention on the glory of God. That’s what makes good worship music….

Wassail, Christmas cookies that I only make at this time of year, egg nog, candy canes (especially melted in hot chocolate).

Jingle bells.

Finding just the right gift for someone you love.

Giving to others.

Christmas choir musicals.

But the absolutely best part of Christmas to me is the way we are so encouraged to reflect and ponder on the wonder of the Incarnation, the Word made flesh, God With Us, our Emmanuel. The best thing about Christmas is that it gives us time and opportunity to really focus on the Gospel, not just the Baby in the manger, but the reason the Baby was born. I’ve started preparing for our Bible study which will start in January, in which we will be using Nancy Guthrie’s book Hoping for Something Better to take a 10 week look at the book of Hebrews. To say I am getting excited about this study is probably an understatement. I am so looking forward to the encouragement to see and savor and grow in love for Jesus, to grow in awe for who He is and what He has done. Because, as the author shared in the introduction to the book, the something better we long for is actually Someone better, none other than Jesus Himself.

If you’ve been reading here for a long time, you probably know how squeamish I feel about portrayals of Jesus through acting and portraits, and I’m not going into all that now. But this year during our Christmas musical, while the characters in the drama were discussing the meaning of Christmas using a little manger scene the Grandpa and Grandson were setting up, on center stage a live manger scene was slowly unfolded, and it was really effective. Mary, Joseph and the baby were played by a real husband and wife and their new little baby, and it was powerful because it really made me think about how very real these people were. On Saturday night, the baby started to fuss a little and the mom handed her (yes, we had a little girl playing the role of the Baby this year), to her husband and I couldn’t sing anymore for a minute because I just got so overwhelmed with thinking about what it must have been like for the real Joseph and the real Mary to hold the Baby Jesus, knowing that this was God’s promised Messiah, the One all the prophecies pointed toward, the Lamb who would take away not just the sin of the world, but their sin as well.

What must it have been like for the shepherds to have the stillness and darkness of that night (and yes, I am aware it was probably not a December night) by the light of the angel telling them the good news of a Savior born in Bethlehem. What wonder as they were able to be among the very first to see the One who is the Great Shepherd for all we who have gone astray.

I love the account of Simeon and Anna when Jesus was presented at the Temple and their joy at seeing the Consolation of Israel. Faithful people who had waited for God’s promised Messiah, His promised Salvation, and who knew the Scriptures well enough to know the time was right. God graciously allowed them to see Him and recognize Him and trust in what He came to do. If you’ve never read it, you can find it in Luke 2:22-38.

Christmas is a holiday of hope because it shows us God’s love and kindness and mercy and grace toward us. It doesn’t stop at the manger but goes all the way to the Cross and the empty tomb. May I never lose the wonder of the One we celebrate. May I seek to know Him more, and to continue to see Him as the something better that my heart yearns for. And as a Gentile, who is eternally grateful to have been grafted in to the faith, my heart sings with Simeon as he says this:

“For my eyes have seen Your salvation
Which You have prepared before the face of all peoples,
A light to bring revelation to the Gentiles,
And the glory of Your people Israel.”

Luke 2:30-32

Pet Peeve

Have you noticed that “Christmas” seems more a taboo word than ever this year? Why is it okay to name other holidays around this time of year, but Christmas has to become “holiday” even when we all know we really mean “Christmas”? I get depressed when I buy a box of cake mix that has red and green sprinkles and green frosting with Christmas trees and red sprinkles and it is called “Holiday” cake mix. We all know we mean Christmas. If I were making a cake for, say, Hanukkah, I doubt I’d pick up the red and green box, so let’s just call things what they are. It bothered my son so much that he took a Sharpie marker and crossed out “Holiday” and wrote “Christmas” on the cake mix box and frosting tub sitting on my kitchen counter.

Yesterday I was in the grocery store across the street, and in the bakery section there is a table with blue and white cakes and cookies and breads with a pretty blue balloon cheerfully wishing us a Happy Hanukkah. Cool, they didn’t say “Happy Holidays,” I thought. Then I saw the table next to it with red and green cookies, cakes, etc. and a covered dish with samples and a note that said, “Holiday cake…please taste a sample.” Also cheerful, but, in my opinion quite hypocritical. Why is it okay to actually say, “Hanukkah,” but on the next table where we all know the red and green signify Christmas, we have to say “Holiday” lest anyone might just be offended. I am not offended by the word, “Hanukkah,” so why is everyone so afraid to say the word, “Christmas”? If you are going to name one holiday, just bite the bullet and acknowledge all of them. If you can’t name one, don’t name any of them. To me, to name one but call the other “Holiday” even though we all know what that euphemistically means actually draws more attention to it rather than less. It just comes across as odd and overly sensitive.

I’ll tell you why people are so skittish about “Christmas” and not any of the other “holidays”. It’s because once you acknowledge Christmas you start thinking about the Christ of Christmas and Jesus Himself told us that one cannot be on the fence about Him. You’re either with Him or against Him, and I believe that deep down inside of us, we all have a sense of that, whether we consciously acknowledge it or not (Romans 1). So, the world has a vested interested in forgetting, pushing aside, ignoring the real reason for the celebration of Christmas.

I know that many people don’t celebrate Christmas, and many who do celebrate it do so in such a secularized, Santa-worshipping way that it isn’t really Christmas anymore anyhow, so really to get bent out of shape about whether people say the word “Christmas” at all is kind of like swatting at a pesky fly. The secularized celebration probably is better suited as “Happy Holidays” anyhow, because it has nothing to do with Christ anymore. For example, I found the movie, The Polar Express, to be very depressing. If that’s all there is to Christmas, no wonder so many people are depressed at this time of year. For me, Christmas is about worship, but for many, many people today it isn’t at all. I get depressed watching secular Christmas shows where much is made of the decorations and Santa and presents and all that part of Christmas, but the majesty and wonder of the real reason we have to celebrate is completely forgotten. This is one reason we don’t “Santa” at our house. Not because we think it is bad or wrong, but because I just don’t see the point in focusing on the fairy tale when we have something so much better and so much more exciting to talk about!

And that, my friends, is why people are afraid of the word “Christmas” and feel such a compulsion to change it to “Holiday” in order to take out the offense. Because it is real. The One we worship at Christmas is real, and holy, and He commands our attention and repentance and worship. Because Christmas does not stop at the manger but goes all the way to the cross and the empty tomb. The cross is the reason the manger happened. One day, every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father. Every eye will look on Him, and there will be no denying then Who He is and that He is absolutely worthy of worship. And because of that, the world system will continue to try to deny and suppress the knowledge of God that is evident, and we will continue to hear “Happy Holidays” when we really mean “Merry Christmas.” So, I don’t get all bent out of shape about “Happy Holidays,” or make a stink about it or an issue of it, or even get in anyone's face with a snarky "Merry Christmas" when they insist on the less offensive greeting, but I do find it extremely hypocritical and annoying, all the same.

Merry Christmas, ya’ll.

Status Report December 2009

Lisa’s status report format is a fun way to encourage blogging for those of us who find we are more and more sporadic about posting and more and more in need of a boost for post ideas. She graciously shares the idea, so I’m borrowing it again today. Hers are always fun to read, too.

Sitting….in my dining room/living room listening to Boo watch Emmett Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas, a childhood favorite of mine. I was so excited when I found it on DVD a couple of years ago, and now I get to share it with my guys. Boo has a stuffed otter named Baby Otter, and she’s enjoying these Muppets.

Drinking…..coffee, mostly decaf with just a tad of regular and lots of hazelnut creamer and Splenda.

Thankful….for a heated house. It was 13 degrees this morning. That’s beyond cold. I didn’t have to convince anyone to wear a coat today! The extreme cold spurred an interesting discussion with the boys as we shivered our way to school wishing the heater in the car would crank up sooner. We were talking about how hard it must have been on the pioneers and settlers when winter came here. So bitterly cold. Then we started talking about how hard it must have been in the hot summer, too. We came to the conclusion that we are quite spoiled and extremely thankful for what we have.

Anticipating….an evening at “Star Wars in Concert” with the boys tonight. They are so excited. This is part of our Christmas gift to them, and a cool benefit to living in a real city where these kinds of things come in concert. Boo gets an evening with her favorite babysitter, and she’s excited, too.

Thinking….that I am not going to do Christmas cards or a letter this year. Maybe I’ll try to do something early in the year instead. I just let it go too long, plus it will cost an arm and a leg on postage and copying.

Needing…to get a picture of the kids made. My mom gave Boo the cutest little Christmas dress, and I need to get them photographed together. Sure would be nice if my camera hadn’t died. Guess what I’ve requested for Christmas.

Ready….for our Christmas musical this weekend. My 11-year-old son is in the drama and I’m singing in the choir. J is doing a great job with his part, and our youth pastor has written a sweet play to go with the music we’re singing. Last night was our first practice with the stage and props and it looks like it’s going to be very nice and I love that the focus is on worshiping Jesus. Last year, Drew had moved up here the first of December and I and the kids came after school let out the week before Christmas. I came up to visit him before bringing the kids and our stuff, though, and that week we visited our church for the first time. It was the week of the Christmas musical, and we never felt the need to visit anywhere else. This church has really become home and we love our church family here. I’m amazed how quickly St. Louis, and especially our church, has become home, and at the tight friendships we’ve formed. We really needed that after the desert of the past few years.

Planning….to do a bunch of baking next week. I want to do several different cookies and mini cranberry bread loaves to give to people. Looking forward to it.

Working….on a goal to go from being a couch-potato to being able to run 3 miles in 30 minutes. I found a plan that I’m following and so far I’ve stayed with it better than I ever have before. Also working to lose about 20 pounds. Hoping the baking next week doesn’t put a damper on my resolve. Moderation….

Reading….The Jesus You Can’t Ignore by John MacArthur. Good stuff. I had to not check out anything else from the library, though, so I could focus on finishing it because Drew wants to read it next and he keeps mentioning that he really would like to read it soon. Also reading Because the Time is Near by John MacArthur because I got to Revelation early in my through the Bible in a year reading plan and I have been wanting to read this verse by verse look at Revelation.

Preparing….for our January Bible study, Hoping for Something Better by Nancy Guthrie. Planning to start today to really focus on our first meeting’s reading. Looking so forward to digging into the book of Hebrews with the sweet ladies who meet together on Tuesdays!

Enjoying….our little Charlie Brown tree this year. We decided not to spend the money on a real tree this year and, besides, we don’t have much room in this apartment. We’re using the little tree Drew put up last December to make our furniture-less apartment more cheery when we moved in the week before Christmas and had to wait until after New Year’s for our furniture. While decorating it the other night, it fell over as we were putting the ornaments on. It's because our floor is slanted. Drew, my hero, was able to stuff some paper under one side of the pot it's in and evened it out so it at least won't fall over anymore. Memories….

Reminiscing....as we watch favorite Christmas movies with the kids....Charlie Brown's Christmas, the Grinch, A Christmas Story. And we have a new favorite read-aloud book that we're going to read together: The Shepherd, The Angel and Walter the Christmas Miracle Dog by Dave Barry.

Also enjoying...reading through an Advent devotional with the kids in the evenings as we seek to make the Christmas season worshipful.

Time….to end this post and go get some work done.

Random Wednesday Thoughts

The weather outside is.....cold. The automatic door on my van did not work this morning because the rain yesterday turned to ice on my van during the night and froze the door shut. Nothing a little extra pulling couldn't handle, but, baby, we're not in South Carolina anymore. Twenty-two degrees and snowing and I STILL have to tell my 11-year-old to wear a real coat. Otherwise he would have left the house this morning wearing his flimsy sweater/hoodie thing that he's been wearing every day since it got colder. It's been driving me nuts that he refuses to wear a heavier coat. I put my foot down this morning, though. He actually did not argue much. It is just plain cold out there. Do you think we could find the gloves I carefully collected when the weather warmed up at the end of last winter season when we needed them this morning, though? One pair is missing altogether, and the other was lost by my 8-year-old within minutes of getting them out this morning. Go figure. Same kid who paid his brother $16.00 to clean his room and then allowed it to get right back into a very sad state within a day and a half. The really mysterious thing is, though, that I cannot find those gloves anywhere. I'm wondering if he really had them this morning at all or if he's remembering some other time when they were in his possession. Very likely. Boo has her gloves, though, so we're averaging one out of three being organized, but that's only because I have more control over the youngest one, I think.

While cleaning the bathroom this morning, there was a loud knock on the door. I turned off my iPod to see if I truly heard a knock and Roscoe the hyper dog was growling at the door. I opened the door and there was a package the mailman had left in the box. Christmas season has begun at the Sweet Tea house. Anyway, Roscoe slipped past me and joyfully raced toward the friendly mailman. I ran out in my sweatpants and shortsleeved shirt (thankfully I had shoes on) to catch him and Boo tried to follow me with her bare feet. It's COLD out today, remember? The mailman kindly stopped and let me chase my dippy dog, who would run right to me and then feint left or right. Both the mailman and I were telling Boo to go back inside. Thankfully Roscoe the hyper dog decided that while it's cold enough to feel really spunky, it was better to be in the warm house so he followed Boo back in the front door. If he had not made that very wise choice right then, I would have had to leave him out and take Boo inside and put on her shoes and coat and my coat on before attempting to catch him. I am very glad he chose the warm house.

By the way, cleaning success today! My bathrooms smell clean!! I finally found a way to erradicate the smell left by boys who cannot aim, seem to not know the function of the flush handle and a 3-year-old girl who is STILL potty training and manages to get potty everywhere in the main bathroom. Bleach is too hard to work with when cleaning the messes because it affects my breathing and ruins my clothes. So, after watching a Mythbusters episode about removing skunk odor, I figured that what worked for them would surely work on my potty smells. I have this really sensitive sense of smell, and it seems that I can never get rid of the smell completely. Well, I took the Mythbusters remedy and tweaked it a little and it seems to have worked. I combined a cup of hydrogen peroxide, a cup of vinegar, a squeeze of liquid dish soap, and a sprinkle of baking soda. Caution: if you try this at home, use a really big bucket. Otherwise you'll have a foaming explosion. The vinegar and baking soda have a fun, sudsy reaction - I was amazed how high it foamed in my bucket. Anyway, then I proceeded to scrub all the toilets, every inch of them, and the floor around them. The result, quite fresh-smelling bathrooms. At least for the moment. The boys are still at school....

Studied AWANA with Boo this afternoon and she learned to say, "Trust in the LORD." She's ready for her class tonight. She wanted to go yesterday, but I told her she had to wait until Wednesday.

It's flurrying again outside. I'm thankful for a heated house. I think we need to look into weather-proofing the windows, though. It was super windy over night (there are trees and branches down along the road), and when I came downstairs this morning, I heard a loud gust of wind. I looked over at the glass door, and the blinds were moving slightly. That was some wind.

One more funny thing then I'm done for now. The UPS man just knocked at the door with a package for us. Boo asked what it is, and I told her it's a present for her and I need to wrap it and put it under the tree. She looked at this plain brown box (she can't read the writing on the side, but I can) and hugged it and said, "I love it! A present for me!" Now she's walking around singing, "Happy birthday, to me...." Three is such a fun age.

Which reminds me of one more thing. Last Wednesday when we were driving home from church the rain that had been falling all day had turned into the first snow of the year - not much, but substantial flurries. I told Boo to look at the snow, and she was really excited. When we parked the car and were walking across the parking lot to the house, she all of a sudden lay down on the wet pavement and started moving her arms and legs. I looked at her for a minute and wondered what in the world was wrong with her when I realized she was trying to make snow angels. I started laughing so hard I almost couldn't tell her to get up because you can't make snow angels on wet pavement when all we've had are flurries. It was so funny. Poor baby. She's really looking forward to the snow.

Okay, that's all the randomness for now. Happy Wednesday.

And On Earth Peace, Goodwill Toward Men

"But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

"This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." 1 John 4:10

Lies Women Believe - Finally Getting A Blog Post Written

We’ve been reading Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss in our Sunday night ladies’ group at church, which is on break until January. I have been wanting to blog about it for a while now, but I haven’t gotten it done until now. I must say, I find it challenging and oh, so good. I really, really, really wish every woman I know, or don’t know, could read this with an open heart and glean from the wisdom shared by honestly examining her own patterns of thinking and believing.

In our last section we dealt heavily with different lies surrounding the seriousness of sin – especially the idea that we are very prone to think our sin is not really all that bad. We also looked a good deal at the lies behind the thinking that we can’t help the way we are. Here’s a quote that sent an arrow into my own heart: “We see things about ourselves we wish were different or that we know are not pleasing to the Lord. But rather than accept personal responsibility for our own choices, attitudes, and behavior, we have 101 reasons for why we are the way we are…” and then she lists examples of the kinds of reasons we often give to excuse away our bad choices, attitudes and behavior. Later, Nancy says, “This lie – “I can’t help the way I am” – makes us into helpless victims of other people and outside circumstances……..........The truth is that we do have a choice. We are responsible for our own choices. We can be changed by the power of God’s Spirit. Once we know and embrace the Truth, we can break free from the chains of our past, our circumstances, and even deeply ingrained habit patterns.”

We also dealt with a related lie, “I am not fully responsible for my actions and reactions.” In this lie, we tend to blame circumstances or the actions of others for the reason we are in a predicament rather than owning up to our own part in the problem because of actions and choices we’ve made. In that section, Nancy quotes another author and this quote, again, struck me: “Sin is the best news there is, the best news there could be in our predicament. Because with sin there is a way out. There’s the possibility of repentance. You can’t repent of confusion or psychological flaws inflicted by your parents - you’re stuck with them. But you can repent of sin. Sin and repentance are the only grounds for hope and joy.” Like I said, challenging, convicting and freeing.

I’ve been thinking about what we’re reading a great deal, obviously. For one thing, the world’s way of counseling and analyzing our problems inevitably is feeding into the lies we believe. When counseling isn’t based on a biblical understanding of the human predicament, well-meaning people feed these lies because what we are left with is a kind of psychoanalyzing of why we do what we do and it ends up causing us to put blame on others and on our circumstances rather than getting us to realize that, at the end of the day, though it may be very, very difficult, we are the ones responsible for the choices we make and how we choose to act. I do think there are things in life that influence how we think and how we see things, but, ultimately, we choose how we act and react on a given day, in a given situation. The more we are aware of the things in our past and the things that influence us, as we surrender them to the Lord, we ought to be growing in victory in making the right choices in spite of our past, our circumstances, what others may have said or done to us or how we feel on a given day.

No one is saying this is easy. But if we buy into the victim mentality and the lies that we are constantly bombarded with by the secular way of thinking that says that we are determined by our circumstances, our past, how we feel, etc. then we will not ever learn to take the responsibility for our choices and we will live in defeat and continue in sin. It is only when we surrender our ‘right’ to be hurt, our ‘right’ to be angry, etc., or our belief that we can’t help the way we are, or all the other lies that are feeding our poor choices and bad attitudes that we will begin to have victory over those poor choices and bad attitudes and wrong reactions. I am convinced that a Spirit-filled life is one that, by the power of the Holy Spirit, takes the responsibility and learns to recognize sin for what it is and for how serious it is and does the hard heart work of owning up and confessing that sin and choosing to walk in the Light and stop blaming others or circumstances for why we do what we do. Hard, hard teaching. But what freedom can result!

I confess, I needed, needed, needed the blunt teaching I’ve found so far in this book, and slowly it seems, I’m learning to shed the lies I didn’t even realize I was believing and walk in the truth.

One thing that has struck me in this first part of our reading is how great a disservice we do to the Gospel when we downplay the sinfulness of sin and call it “wrong choices,” “mistakes,” “personality flaws,” or when we focus on “felt needs” at the expense of the real need at the core of all those surface troubles, which is sin. This is one of my biggest concerns with the seeker type movement and the Purpose Driven Life movement. They do not adequately tell the truth. They do not go deep enough. We do not need to add Jesus to our life, we need to surrender our life to Him. Subtle difference, but a vital one.

We are all sinners. We all fall short of the glory of God. We all willfully choose our own way. All we like sheep have gone astray, there is none righteous, no, not one. That is the awful truth. Ultimately, I am not really the way I am because of something that was said or done in my past, but I am what I am because I am a sinner. We need a Savior. Praise God that in Christ my sin is washed clean by His blood, shed for me. Praise God that I can come to Him in repentance when He opens my eyes and my heart to my desperate need for forgiveness and He freely offers that forgiveness to everyone who repents and believes that He is Lord. When we know the Son, we are free, indeed. Free from blaming others for our faults, free from living as a victim to those faults, and free to walk in His light.

I highly recommend this book. Be prepared to have your toes stepped on and to be uncomfortable when you begin to see lies you’ve believed that you maybe didn’t even realize you had been believing. But that’s not a bad thing.

Practical Mom's Dictionary Installment #11

Serendipity: When you are wandering around your kitchen wondering what you can substitute to satisfy a raging chocolate craving when there is no chocolate in the house, and then you suddenly remember the partial KitKat bar you were saving in a secret hiding place for just such an emergency.

Necessary Forethought: Remembering to buy a small amount of chocolate to replenish the secret stash when it gets low.

Practical Mom's Dictionary Installment #10

Dilemma: It is quite cold out today, and I was planning to drive up and meet my boys so they wouldn’t have to walk home in the cold. My 3-year-old who has virtually given up naps but who is habitually in a cranky mood in the evening because of the lack of nap just fell asleep in my lap, and it is just about time to leave to meet the boys. So, do I let them walk home in the cold in the hopes we can keep the princess from being crabby today, or do I risk the wrath of the cranky 3-yr-old, which has been exhausting lately, and wake her right now? What to do, what to do?

Thankful

Isaiah 60:1-3
"Arise, shine;
For your light has come!
And the glory of the LORD is risen upon you.
For behold, the darkness shall cover the earth,
And deep darkness the people;
But the LORD will arise over you,
And His glory will be seen upon you.
The Gentiles shall come to your light,
And kings to the brightness of your rising."

I am forever thankful that God opened the eyes of this Gentile to His glory and mercy and grace. May I never lose the wonder of His grace, the wonder of the Cross that purchased redemption for even me, a Gentile who was lost in darkness and bound by sin, until He graciously opened my heart to His salvation. There is no other name given among men by which we may be saved, but Jesus Christ alone. He is our hope, our redeemer, our salvation, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Jesus is the way, the truth and the life, and only through Him may we come to the Father, only by faith in Him, covered by His blood, hid in Christ, may we be reconciled to God. Jesus is my faithful High Priest, my Advocate, and I am so very, very thankful to be grafted in to the life He gives through faith. Hallelujah! What a Savior!

My Thoughts Upon Watching Another Classic Movie

So, we watched Dr. Zhivago a couple of evenings this week (that thing is loooong, took us more than one night to finish it). We’ve been watching some classics recently – some we had never seen or seen so long ago we couldn’t remember them, and Drew brought this home for us since he’d never seen it. I remember watching it once as a young girl, but didn’t remember a whole lot of it, so it was fun to watch it with Drew.

I mentioned on Facebook the other day that I often find when I watch movies that are talked about as great movies or that are still popular today and show up on a lot of people's favorite lists, often I don’t get why they are considered classics. Citizen Kane was one of those for me. At the end of that one Drew and I looked at each other and said, “That was it? Big deal.” I know it’s famous for some new directorial things or whatever, but, still, I don’t get it. I also don’t get the big deal about The Graduate (sorry, Dad.). The music in that one is great, the movie, I didn’t so much like. Maybe I need to watch it again now that I'm grown up? The reason I was saying anything about it on Facebook was because we had just watched Rebel Without a Cause. (I almost typed without a Clue…..) I was not impressed. At all. Another one where we looked at each other and said, “That was it?” Cheesy music, cheesy acting, story line and dialogue I had trouble buying into. I’m thinking that one is popular because James Dean died shortly after it was released.

So, I guess I am old movie challenged. There are some I have loved, so I’m not all that bad. The African Queen comes to mind, as do many of the Alfred Hitchcock movies and Casablanca and Ben Hur so my taste isn’t totally ruined, I guess.

Anyway, unlike Rebel Without a Cause, I do see why Dr. Zhivago has staying power and is considered a classic. Better acting, MUCH better music (though we were both REALLY tired of Lara’s Theme by the end), great and memorable sets and filming, and a sweeping story set against a dramatic historical backdrop. I don’t know a whole lot about the Russian Revolution, so that is interesting to me.

However, as supposedly one of the best love stories of all time, I have something against it. I just didn’t get what was so great about Lara that he was willing to risk losing everything to be with her. And he did lose everything. He wasn’t even unhappy in his marriage. I’m not sure he married his wife because he was madly in love with her, more that it seemed to be the expected thing and he was the kind of guy who did what was expected of him. But he DID marry her and had a child with her and another on the way. She loved him and was faithful to him and was a good wife. We’re supposed to see him as noble, if a bit naive, and a likable character, and I did like him right up until the point where he cheats on his very pregnant, very faithful wife. Prior to that, Drew and I were speculating that maybe she would die in childbirth and that was how he ended up with Lara, and we kept thinking he seemed too honorable to actually cheat on his wife. But nope. So, I had a hard time being very moved by this grand love affair thing. I kept wanting him to do the right thing. (Unimportant and unnecessary aside: Of course he picks the blond-haired, blue-eyed woman over his beautiful brunette wife. Said bitterly by the brunette writing this post.)

Even in the end, he didn’t even really love Lara, because he didn’t go after her. He just let her go off with that horrid man, and, as far as we the viewers know, didn’t even bother to try to find out whatever happened to her. Blech.

I’m thinking the book is probably better. If I ever get around to reading it, I am sure there is more characterization and detail than the movie is able to provide, and it might make more sense. Then again, I’m not sure I really care all that much. But at least I do see why this movie has staying power. I actually cared enough about the characters and story to be bothered by it enough to write a blog post. And a story that can draw you in to where you actually care about what happens to the people and that you keep thinking about for a long time after reading or watching it makes for a good story, even if you don't really like the people or the choices they make all that much.

Hard to Feel Much Sympathy

Apparently the man who took it upon himself to shoot soldiers at Ft. Hood may be paralyzed. In light of the fact that the family members of his victims have lost, will have to spend the rest of their lives grieving the loss of, their husbands, fathers, wives, etc., I'm not sure I can gather up much sympathy that he may have permanently lost the use of his legs. I know that as Christians, we are not to seek revenge, and I'm not saying what I'm saying out of a sense of vengence. I am also not saying that we should not pray for this man, in the hope that he will one day hear and respond to the Good News of salvation found in Jesus Christ alone. We should pray for him. He is lost, and that should grieve our hearts. I'm just saying, I don't think there will be much sympathy if the spokemen for this man happen to be looking for any. He chose to do a despicable thing. He is not a victim. I'm not too sorry for him at all that he now has serious consequences to face.

And, for the record, those family members of his who keep insisting that he is a 'good American??' I beg to differ. A 'good American' does not walk into an Army base and shoot and kill and injure his brothers in arms, his fellow military members. No, a good American does not do such things. As an Army wife, I ache for those who have lost loved ones in this terrible act.

And another thing, it seems to be coming to light that there were warning signs all over the place about this man, and that people were afraid to report them or further investigate them for fear of being 'crucified' for doing so, for fear of being shut down and accused of profiling. There is something very wrong with the whole political correctness mindset that led to him being allowed to continue and not be investigated fully. I am so tired of being told that profiling is wrong. It would have saved a bunch of lives in this case. I am also really tired of hearing that a certain religion is a religion of peace so we need to not profile. If someone in the type of position this man held is making the kinds of statements he is reported to have been making, then those who have the authority to investigate him should have the freedom to do so to the best of their ability, without being accused of 'profiling.' It isn't profiling if he's giving legitimate reason for concern. If he's innocent, great, they will find that out. If not, maybe they would be able to prevent something like this or worse from happening again, but apparently we're so concerned about political correctness that we'd rather tie the hands of those who would investigate these kinds of threats than we are about protecting innocent people.

Just sayin'.

Christmas Music

While practicing our choir Christmas music this afternoon, which is very worshipful, I find I am in a weird place regarding Christmas this year. I love the lights and the decorations and, most especially, the wonder and worship of Christmas - the reminder of God With Us, our Immanuel, and that's the part I look forward to. If allowed to focus on our great and awesome God and His immense grace in coming to redeem us, in coming to live among us and do for us what we could not do and reconciling us to Himself through the cross and His resurrection, Christmas can almost undo me, in a good way. I love that the beauty of the story does not end with the angels singing to the shepherds on that night in Bethlehem, and it does not end with the wonder of the Baby born in the stable, and it doesn’t end with the majesty of the wise men coming and bringing gifts to the Child and bowing in worship before Him. That is beautiful and glorious, yes.

But the wonder of Christmas is that in fulfilling all the prophecy of a coming Messiah, the manger looks forward to the Cross. Jesus came to redeem us to Himself. He endured the humility of taking on human flesh and living among a people who did not recognize Who He was, who refused to see and repent when He confronted their false and corrupted traditions that mocked the God they claimed to serve, and who eventually turned on Him and spit on Him and humiliated Him to such a point that He suffered the humiliation and shame of a gruesome Roman cross. And as He did so, He prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And when He died, He triumphantly cried, “It is finished!” and the Temple veil was torn top to bottom. For those who have eyes to see and ears to hear, the way is open to God the Father through faith in His Son, Jesus Christ. He rose again on the third day, death is conquered, by His stripes, we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray, and He is our Great Shepherd.

So, I love the wonder of Christmas. I am not a scrooge. My oldest son gets to be in the drama part of the Christmas musical this year, and our youth minister has written a wonderful drama to go with our choir music. I love the part my son gets to play. It will add much to our celebration and point our eyes to our King this December.

But I don't so much like the hustle and shopping and trying to decide what to get for everyone without overdoing it. That’s where I’m feeling a little scroogish. That part I'm not so much looking forward to this year, and wish I didn't feel so panicked about it already. This year, especially, I am dreading the material celebration of Christmas, and I’m trying to tone it down. I’ll go shopping, but I don’t want that to be our focus. We have not done as well with that in years past. Thankfully, the economy is helping us with that this year, too.

Anyway, I really enjoyed practicing my Christmas music this afternoon. May I keep the reason for the season in the forefront this year.

One More Post Before I Break

I know, I am taking a blogging break. But I have to get this post out first.

Does anyone else find this to be true? For all that I want to be biblically minded and want to be growing in Christ, how is it that I still continue to do such colossally stupid, unkind, ugly things sometimes? In fact, I fear the hypocrite in me. At the time I thought I was just venting and in the okay, only to realize that I had made a rather blatant misunderstanding and spouted off in the wrong way and really messed up. I can even tell you several scripture passages I violated this afternoon. Me and my stupid, stupid words and my stupid, stupid too quick to speak, too slow to think.

The thing I want to do, I didn’t do today, and the thing I don’t want to do, I did. And it’s a direct result of spending too much time on the computer when I should have been doing something else. Hence the break. I’ll be back, I just need to get my time prioritized better first.

Blogging Break

I am taking a break from blogging for a little while. I haven't yet determined how long, but I'll be back eventually. Need to focus on something other than the computer for a bit.